"Aah!" I shriek as the feeling of cold water trickle down my back.
It's no joke wearing a two-piece when some guy pours water down your back.
"Dave!" I say, chasing after him.
He looks over his shoulder, lets out a laugh & dives into the pool, swimming to the other end of the pool. I dive in & swim after him.
I finally manage to catch up & grab onto Dave's ankle. I tug it & he tries to kick.
I pull him down under water with me.
His light hair was floating around his head & he sticks his tongue out at me.
Right after that, he goes above the surface, me following his lead.
I could hear him gulping a big breath of air to start his race all over again.
My cousin, Josh & his girlfriend, Marsh are currently making out behind the trees, I know. They always go there when they 'excuse themselves'.
One is to make out. The second reason is because they want to leave me alone with Dave. For a weird reason, they think we 'connect'.
Please. We connected.
He's my ex. Unlike all the other ex-couples in the History of Exes, we are the odd one out.
We're not bitter toward each other - we always hang out at the pool or somewhere else.
It was depressing knowing that we aren't going to go on a date again because, like I said. We broke up.
Who goes back with their exes? I mean, that's totally against all rules of... Well, something.
I finally give up chasing after him - you would too after trying to chase a champ swimmer - & lounge at the curve of the pool, watching him get up & shaking the water out of his moppy brown hair.
He catches me looking at him but I turn away quickly enough to look down at my feet, playing with the water ripples.
From across the pool, he calls out my name & gives me a sign to call him.
I nod & give the thumbs up.
He smiles & walks away, out of my sight, out of my reach.
What sucks about hanging out with your ex is that it gives off the vibe that I'm still in love with her, Jamelia - or as I called her, Jamie.
What sucks even more is that... It's true.
I get up & leave the pool, after reminding Jamie.
I pass the rows of tall trees, a perfect make-out location. I hear breathy sighs & heavy breathings. As I pass it, I say, "See ya, guys."
"My little Davey is going for a date!" my mom coos as she sees me put on a Polo shirt.
"Mooooooom!" I groan, trying to make her stop the cooing.
"But it's true! You're going here & there, as if a tornado might struck. Davey, are you late for your date with Jamelia?"
Yea, my mom didn't know that we broke up - she's pretty old-fashioned. I mean, she's happy when I go out but she thinks that if you see a person longer than 2 months, we're officially married or something.
Which is why I get nervous when she passes tux shops & stop to gaze at it for awhile & glance back at me.
"Yea, mom. I'm late." I said exasperatedly.
Of course that woman can tell I'm late since I just came out of the shower & went straight to my closet to get something & started to practice the speech I'd say to her later with the mirror.
"Ciao, Mom!" I say after one last check & run out of the door.
"Jamie, it's for you!" my mom sings.
"Coming." I say & wish that my hair isn't so hard to groom.
I've nearly finish the conditioning, so all I have to do is comb my hair & put on a little more Chanel & I'm ready.
I pass a quick glance at the clock & realize that he's late.
Smiling, I remember the times when he always comes to the my front porch late.
But, then again... I wasn't done yet myself.
My parents doesn't know that we broke up. I sorta feel guilty at times for not telling them but he's kind of the first guy I've introduced to them & it took them a month to trust him.
If I say anything about me not being with him, my parents'd give me this life-long lecture about how boys are not meant to be toys & all that.
Seriously. You'd think that being celebs' personal therapists, my parents would be a little bit more understanding.
Anyway, I am being all stressed on not tripping on my - I quote from my mom - floor-sweeping dress down the stairs.
But for all the worry & stress in the world, personally, I think it is totally worth it.
He's there, like I said, looking so, so hot in that familiar no-tie-casual tux, panting - probably from the running.
His hair is still damp & ruffled, but I could tell he tried to comb it with his fingers - he hasn't change since.
I know that he must've been running late since he didn't have time to dry his hair, let alone comb it.
& he still looks so, so cute.
"Hi." he pants.
"Hi." I smile.
A flash suddenly goes off & I blink at the source, which is my mom humiliating me with a dinosaur-era-looking camera.
Geesh. It isn't like it's my first date, you know.
It isn't even a date (much to my chagrin).
I stare at her, who looks nearly as gorgeous as she does in a swimsuit - nearly.
The candle's flame is flickering between us, giving us this romantic atmosphere.
Which isn't the kind of atmosphere one normally wants for a break-up anniversary with their ex.
"So..." I say, clearing my throat.
"So...?" she smiles a small smile.
It's one of those things we did as a couple. I mean, hard to believe that I used to be really shy around her.
Then again, I was only thirteen at the time.
We barely talked in public but we smiled a lot. She made me smile.
One of the things I love about her.
It's half past nine as we walk under the moonlit park.
We aren't holding hands like we used to.
But we're walking side-by-side. Except he was walking a little further behind.
"Dave..." I call out softly.
"Mm?" he says behind me.
"Why did we break up?"
Silence. The worst kind of silence - awkward silence.
"You never said it, you know." he says as the silence passed.
I know what you're thinking. You're wondering what it was.
It was... Those three special words couples always say.
You know... The one which always involves the word love between I & you..
"I always did, but you never. Said it, I mean." he continues.
"I know."
I really did. I could still remember that first night he said it - he called & whispered I love you through the phone line.
I was speechless & just hung at the sentence "I..."
It's not because I don't, you know. It's because in those touching movies, especially the Walt Disney kind, the hero & heroine would look deeply into each other's eyes, say I love you & begin the passionate kiss.
I want that. I mean, genuinely & sincerely.
I don't want to be one of those couples who say I love you only because it was a hormonal thing.
I want to say it first & mean it, you know?
Yes, I believe in sincerity.
"Why do you tell me this now?" she asks in a quiet voice, not so much as a glance back.
"What do you mean why do I tell you this now?! I always told you!" I say, furious.
Where had she been the past few weeks after the break-up? Pluto?
Were my discretion too discreet?
"You just chose not to listen." I say, my voice softening because we never argue.
& also because we're in a public place at night - & people are trying to sleep.
"No, you chose to keep it yourself!" she yells.
"What?" I say. Not because I couldn't hear her - well, obviously it isn't because of that - but because she is yelling at me.
"You heard. You didn't tell me about this. If you did, I could've apologized at least!" she yells again.
I am resisting the urge to check her temperature. Is she on a high?!
She is putting the blame on me for not telling her when, may I recap, I kept asking her about it!
& suddenly, just suddenly, she bursts into tears.
"Maybe we should go back home." he says, looking down at me.
I sniff. He's being nice to me.
Same ol' nice Dave. That's the Dave I know.
I like.
I lo-
"Yea, maybe we should." I say.
The rest of the walk's plain awkward. The kind where you just rather jump off a cliff then walking alongside your ex in a park in total silence.
We reach my porch & he clears his throat, says goodnight & left me standing there.
& I watch him walk away.
We haven't talked since that night. It's so awkward that even Josh & Marsh notice it.
They keep trying to make us talk but we just keep looking at anything - anything but each other.
"Well... I'll see you guys, kay? I've got some chores to do." Marsh says & we wave back at her.
"Hmm, you know, I think this is a good time to clean my room? Chiao." I say & walk away.
So shoot me. Lamest excuse I've given in my whole life.
"Hey, Josh..." I say.
"Mm?"
"How did you know Marsh's the One?" I ask.
He chokes on his Coke. Can't say I blame him.
I mean, hello, I'm guessing that it was a leetle bit too personal.
But we're cousins of the same age. Different gender, maybe.
But that's probably why I asked him, not Marsh.
I wanna hear it from their view.
"Well..." he clears his throat. "Lemme ask you three questions, & you answer them, alright?"
I nod.
"What do you feel when you see Dave?" he asks.
I blush. Am I that obvious?
Are we that obvious?
"Tell anyone & I swear I'll tell Marsh about your geeky Power Rangers collection." I glare at him & he laughs, "Alright, alright. Now answer my question!"
"Well... I feel... I dunno, happy. Like the world's okay."
"Okay, next question : Who's the first person you'd think of when you have a problem?"
"Dave." I say automatically & immediately clap my hands on my mouth.
God, why am I so pathetic??? It's the least I could do but to slap my face back to reality.
"& finally... Are you always thinking of what to do when you're with Dave?"
"Yea! That's totally how I feel!"
"Okay, now lemme tell you what these all mean : I feel all this about Marsh. I always feel happy seeing her, I always tell her my problems & I always get this paranoia of doing something stupid in front of her. That's how I feel. So good luck with Dave."
He winks & leaves me thinking.
"Um, miss? Miss?" a voice says.
I look up & saw a blonde guy smiling at me.
"Oh, hey, Brad." I said casually.
Brad's the waiter working at the cafe at Level 6, near the pool area. He's cool, a uni-student. Went out with him once but he wasn't my type.
So I'm kinda close with him. He's like my third closest guy friend, after Dave & Josh, of course.
We're making small talk & he's telling me about his problems with his on & off girlfriend - I dunno, some chick who keeps boffing off with his best friend or something. The details are pure soap opera material, I swear.
So, as a good friend should, I calm him down & advice him that maybe his girlfriend's just not committed while he's cleaning the tables & collecting tips from the customers.
As the cafe empties, we're all alone, still talking.
I turn my back just for a second - a second - & kept going, "Uhhuh. Yea" each time Brad pause his story to pick up the fork left on the floor. For some reason, Brad stops talking & I feel that something's wrong.
I turn around & saw Dave, glaring murderously at Brad, God knows why.
One second, Brad was standing on his feet. The next, he's on the floor after Dave gives a punch at the jaw.
Dave's standing at his feet, breathing heavily like he was fighting the most important war the world depends on.
I'm walking towards Brad, saying, "Oh my God! Dave! Brad? Are you alright?"
Dave stops me & grabs me by the wrist, dragging me to a secluded area, leaving Dave & his bleeding nose on the floor.
As we reach a shady place at a corner of the 'A' block, I snatch my wrist away from his grasp & half-shriek, "Dave! What's wrong with you?! Why're you acting all weird? Why did you punch Brad?!"
He looks at me in the eye & there's something about that look that just makes me want to run away. Something so... Intense going on in his head.
He's silent & keeps staring at me with that intense look.
I look away from his eyes - those hypnotic eyes - & run my gaze across his clenched fist by his side.
"Dave! Your hand... Oh God, Dave." I sigh & it's my turn now to drag him to the tap that's always at each corner of the block.
I run the water on his hand & begins the nagging.
"Dave, why did you punch Brad? You know, I can't believe you'd do something like that! & look, you could've injured your hand. Look at your skin, Dave! God, don't be so irresponsible. I mean, seriously."
Seriously. His fist's red & raw, the knuckles white because he's clenching his fist tightly as I gently massage it under the rush of the water.
But I didn't stop the nagging. Ohh no, I'm so not done with him yet.
"... See? You've been watching too much of NYPD. Don't do those kind of punching acts, acting as if you're saving me from God knows what! Thank God you didn't fracture your hand or I-"
I didn't get to continue my nagging because at that moment, he grabs me by the shoulders, cups my face with both his hands - including the swollen one - & kisses me.
Dave, my ex-boyfriend, who I had been dating for nearly 3 years, is kissing me.
& I'm kissing him back as I close my eyes.
& this rush of memories floods into my brain, snapshots of us together at the pool, at the squash court...
Us together.
& then, the most horrid memory crashes into my sight.
I was yelling at him, he was yelling at me. The threatening tears were stinging my eyes, I remembered.
& just like that, he got out of the pool, dried himself with the towel & left me there.
I opened my eyes & realize that his hands are at my waist, holding onto me as if he doesn't want to let go.
& me guilty with charge of running my fingers through his hair like I always wanted to.
I push him away, though the bigger part of me protests & he staggers away.
"Wh-what?" he says raggedly.
"No. We can't do this. We broke up." I say, shaking my head.
I'm not risking the level of looking at him. Because if I do, I know I'm going to lose it.
"Why won't you say it? Why won't you just say it?" he says, his temper getting the best of him.
I keep silent but he goes on.
"You know, when you broke up with me, at the pool, I thought that there, at that spot, I'll start distancing myself away. But no, you keep dragging me in. Dragging me into this whirlwind, this... This... Geez, Jamie! I thought that at that moment, I'll start hating you. I planned it all. I kept telling myself I'll find a new girl, someone more... More there for me. But you just can't see that I'm trying my best to start over. & you make me - hell, no. Remind me the reasons why I like you, why I lo-"
"Don't say it!" I scream in a whisper.
"Why are you so afraid of those three words, Jamie?" he says huskily. "Three simple words."
"Because... Because..."
& it all spills out, like lava erupting from a volcano. I can't take it anymore. I really can't.
"... & the worst is, I want to mean it. I want to really mean it. But I've never said it before. Not to anyone, not to my mom, nada. & face fact, you broke up with me, remember?" I say.
He looks at me as if he really wants to hit me, only he can't because I'm a girl.
"You broke up with me, querida."
Damn him & his stupid Spanish lessons.
"How can I break up with someone when I just love him?!" I scream.
He gapes at me with astonishment, like he's dreaming.
I can't believe it. I said it.
I said it.
He drags me & our faces are now inches away, his lips on mine.
"Now. Was that so hard?" he says against my lips.
"DAVE!!" I yell as the cold water trickle down my back.
He laughs & runs away, doing laps around the pool.
I swim after him & catch him, tugging on his ankle.
I finally caught him.
She caught me. I lift her with my ankle & pull her hand with mine.
"You caught the wanted. Here's the reward." I say & give it to her.
I hear someone laughing - correction, two someones - & turn around, her in my arms, her hands around my neck.
"Get a room!" Josh laughs & I stick a tongue at the two.
"Right back atcha, bud!" I wink & get out of the pool, Jamie behind me.
I pass the cafe with her & see Brad, that waiter guy, waiting on people.
He's got a bandage on the bridge of his nose.
I enter the cafe & apologized to him.
He looks at me & notice my hand around her shoulders, hers around my waist.
He gives a wink at Jamie & walks away, giving me a nod.
"What was that all about?" Dave asks me as soon as we left the cafe.
"Nothing." I say innocently.
I did mention that I confide everything to Brad like he does me?
"Hey, where are we going?" I ask.
"Somewhere." he says innocently, mocking my tone.
I mock-punched him & he laughs & I chase him.
He leads me to a familiar secluded corner at a familiar block, near a tap.
It's getting hot & heavy. Her fingers are running through my hair, my fingers are roaming at the collar bone area.
We get up for air & a familiar - too familiar - voice pass us & whispers, "Bye, guys."
Thursday, 7 June 2007
Tuesday, 29 May 2007
Cheating Hurts
[EDIT] This isn't my work of writing. It's just a chain but... It is a story & it's bittersweet.
... In a suicidal way.
--
Girl is on the couch making out with a
hot guy, her cellphone rings...
Girl: Hey babe, I'll be right back. I
need to take this call.
Boy: Yeah okay. Sure.
She walks into the next room.
Girl: Hey! What's up?
Guy [on her cellphone]: Nothing, hey
hun, do you think we could go do
something later tonight? What are the
chances my boss let me get out early.
Girl: Yeah, sounds great!
Guy [on her cellphone]: Okay. I'm right
by your house, I'll come to get you
now.
Girl: That's not such a good idea...
Guy [on her cellphone]: Why not?
Girl: I'm busy right now... sorry.
Guy [on her cellphone]: With what? It's
our anniversary! You didn't make any
other plans did you...?
In her head she yells, SH!T! Throws
clothes back on quickly.
Girl: No, no... I was just eating...
with the family.
Guy [on her cellphone]: But I thought
you said your family was away this
weekend, up at your resort?
The guy walks into her house, turns the
corner into the hallway. Goes
downstairs, and finds his bestfriend on
her couch, half un-dressed, trying to
pull his pants back on and his
girlfriend pulling her shirt over her
head.
Guy: What the hell is going on?!
Girl: I can explain! Please listen to
me!
Guy: Edward? How could you do this to
me! Minnie! I thought you loved me! And
yet, your sleeping with MY BEST
FRIEND!
Girl: John...!
John with tears in his eyes, he rushes
out of room, and slams the door.
Edward climbs out of the window, starts
his car, and drives off down the
street.
Girl runs after her boyfriend.
Yelling...
Girl: NOOOO! Please!! Come back, John!
Please?!
She falls down and
cries.
John turns around, looks straight at
his girlfriend in tears.
John: Why? Minnie, why? I loved you! Oh
God, I'm in love with a whore. Does
this mean I have to pay you now?!
Here take this as the cash.
He drops a
ring box on her lap.
She opens the ring box. Her jaw
drops... Before her eyes is a diamond
wedding ring.
Girl: You were going to propose?
Guy: Yeah... how dumb was I?
And as he
slowly walked back to his car, his
headlights faded... And she was in
despair.
Later that night, the girl got a phone
call from the police saying he just
jumped off the bridge and killed
himself.
... In a suicidal way.
--
Girl is on the couch making out with a
hot guy, her cellphone rings...
Girl: Hey babe, I'll be right back. I
need to take this call.
Boy: Yeah okay. Sure.
She walks into the next room.
Girl: Hey! What's up?
Guy [on her cellphone]: Nothing, hey
hun, do you think we could go do
something later tonight? What are the
chances my boss let me get out early.
Girl: Yeah, sounds great!
Guy [on her cellphone]: Okay. I'm right
by your house, I'll come to get you
now.
Girl: That's not such a good idea...
Guy [on her cellphone]: Why not?
Girl: I'm busy right now... sorry.
Guy [on her cellphone]: With what? It's
our anniversary! You didn't make any
other plans did you...?
In her head she yells, SH!T! Throws
clothes back on quickly.
Girl: No, no... I was just eating...
with the family.
Guy [on her cellphone]: But I thought
you said your family was away this
weekend, up at your resort?
The guy walks into her house, turns the
corner into the hallway. Goes
downstairs, and finds his bestfriend on
her couch, half un-dressed, trying to
pull his pants back on and his
girlfriend pulling her shirt over her
head.
Guy: What the hell is going on?!
Girl: I can explain! Please listen to
me!
Guy: Edward? How could you do this to
me! Minnie! I thought you loved me! And
yet, your sleeping with MY BEST
FRIEND!
Girl: John...!
John with tears in his eyes, he rushes
out of room, and slams the door.
Edward climbs out of the window, starts
his car, and drives off down the
street.
Girl runs after her boyfriend.
Yelling...
Girl: NOOOO! Please!! Come back, John!
Please?!
She falls down and
cries.
John turns around, looks straight at
his girlfriend in tears.
John: Why? Minnie, why? I loved you! Oh
God, I'm in love with a whore. Does
this mean I have to pay you now?!
Here take this as the cash.
He drops a
ring box on her lap.
She opens the ring box. Her jaw
drops... Before her eyes is a diamond
wedding ring.
Girl: You were going to propose?
Guy: Yeah... how dumb was I?
And as he
slowly walked back to his car, his
headlights faded... And she was in
despair.
Later that night, the girl got a phone
call from the police saying he just
jumped off the bridge and killed
himself.
Monday, 23 April 2007
The Assembly
It all happened one Monday - typical assembly day. I mean, yeah, everyone hates Monday - including me because who wants to loll around listening to people talking about this & that?
So there I was, walking down the old hill to the school gates, early-late as usual (early-late’s my term of being late but considered early in my book. Hence, early-late).
Other seniors past me by, rushing to make it before 7:45 in the morning, which I don’t get. I mean, why bother rushing when you just know you’re not gonna make it?
The bag on my shoulders were swinging, right, left, right, left.
It was something like strolling - only not at a park but the school’s hill, approaching the school gate.
“Excuse me?” a prefect said, stopping me. “Yea?” I said, feigning innocence. “Where’s your IDC?” she asked.
IDC was our school Identity Card. So that, instead of asking what’s your name & all that, you can just take a look at the ol’ card & nod & say what a nice name you have.
That’s what Mrs Jones kept saying anyway.
In other words, it’s just to make us an easier target for giving us fines by the prefects.
“Oh. Well, I didn’t bring it.” I said calmly. “Well, I’m afraid I’d have to give you a fine. What’s your name, please?” the prefect asked.
I gave her the details - name & class.
While I was telling her all that, I was fancying this whole James Bond scenario. You know, where James Bond goes all macho, facing the villain, saying his trademark line : “The name’s Bond. James Bond.” & the villain’d say, “Well, I’m afraid I’d have to kill you.”
It kinda makes the scene more exciting instead of facing some boring senior, giving you fines. I mean, really.
Typical day, the thought kept echoing in my head while I just hummed a happy tune.
“Hurry up, please.” one or two prefects said to me as I past by them, dropping my bag on the floor, near the classroom door & rushing up the staircase while putting on the blue-striped blazer, adjusting my tie, displaying my IDC.
“Hurry up, please.” another prefect said as I went into the hallway.
I tried my best not to roll my eyes. Who knew? Maybe there’s this rule against rolling your eyes at higher authority figures.
I went into the hall & tried my best not to smile at the familiar surroundings - the rowdy students, all restless waiting for the Chairman of our school to arrive. The prefects giving fines to said restless students. & us, the latecomers - most notorious of all was me. If there was this secret gathering place for prefects, I’d have been blacklisted, a black & white picture of me hung in the “Late-comers” hall of fame.
Still smiling, I lined up behind a few boys, taller than me. Meaning, they’re older than me. Because as far as I’m concerned, there was no boy taller than me & happened to be my age.
Except for Garrett, of course. But hey, he’s always tall & he’s already with what’s-her-name.
The prefects ushered us to these seats, which I’ve labelled Middies because, it’s smack right in the middle - perfect for private whispers & snickers. The prefects would be too caught up with the other students making noise at the side.
Yes, us students have a strategy. It was really rare at that time that I actually got to sit in the Middies. It’s like every students’ dream to sit there & I was taking my seat at the dream spot with people I didn’t know then.
I was feeling a little uncomfortable. I mean, c’mon. Like you wouldn’t get uncomfortable when sitting in between of two older guys, who, might I add, were complete strangers to me?
One was busy occupying himself with his other friend on his left. The other on my right was looking equally uncomfortable, fidgeting with the black buttons on his blazer.
“Students, please rise.” a prefect’s voice bounced off the walls. The students rose like zombies, probably still half-asleep.
“We will now sing the national anthem & the school song.” The familiar tune of a piano chimed & we all began to sing our country’s anthem.
Whenever I sang aloud, I couldn’t help but wonder why people kept looking at me (& I couldn’t help but feel please when I answer myself in my head).
Everyone kept turning around to look at me - including the guy on my right, to my immense pleasure.
After singing aloud, we stood up as the Chairwoman walked in the Hall, her stilletto heels click-clacking against the wooden floor.
She greeted us & we greeted her back, with the same sing-song voice we always put on to impress teachers.
It’s a tradition.
When we sat down, she began her weekly morning chirping - example : “So how are you students today? Have you had your breakfast? No? Do you know, dear students, that breakfast is the most important meal of the day?”
I said the last sentence at exactly the same time the chairwoman did. I got plenty of approving looks, majority of them reading, “Not bad, kid”. I had shrug my shoulders coolly at them. The only look I got different was from guy on my right - disapproving. I looked at him & he pretended that there was something rather intresting of his nails.
Nice try, bud.
From there, she strayed from the small talk & began talking about that day’s topic: Sportsmanship.
My school? Yea, very big on this whole sportsmanship deal. Of course, it also majors our education & our soul.
Meaning, the students of the Darren Academy were no headbangers or on crack.
We all groaned - inwardly & outwardly - & she just ignored it & continued her speech.
“As students of this academy, we are known for our sportsmanship.” she said, filled with gusto.
“We must never jeer or boo when there comes a time your house may lose a game. We are sportsman, dear students! Let me tell you a story with a moral to end with.”
We were all waiting for some really elaborate story of some kid losing to his best friend & they fought & little happy bunnies jump out & save the day! Whatever. Along the lines there.
What we didn’t expect was the story she was about to tell us…
“Do you know, dear students, the story of The Rabbit & the Tortoise?” she asked us.
That time, we made a noise twice the volume of our original sound.
She began her stories, impersonating high-pitched voices to deep, low ones. I mean, okay, that’d be enough for the lady’s dignity.
But why, oh why, did she have to do actions with her story? I mean, she even tried to jog on the spot with a suit!
A suit!
That was the woman who found our school - & there she was, jogging on the spot on the stage in her suit!
I don’t know her.
Then, the guy on my right started muttering furiously under his breath, “It’s the Tortoise & the Hare! The Tortoise & the Hare!”
At first, I thought he was suffering some sort of obsessive disease or something. Not alot of normal people get worked up over &-the-moral-of-the-story-is... stories.
People my age, I mean.
I looked at him & burst out in giggles. Really, giggles. That caught his attention & he looked at me with the expression I think I gave him. The what’s-up-with-her? look.
You’d probably do the same, you’re wondering why I went into fits of giggles, right? I mean, if you saw him, you wouldn’t expect furious muttering from that kind.
He’s the kind who looked like he had never forgotten his homework, books, uniform. His blonde hair was crisp - neat-crisp. No mohawk, no mullet. Just crisp, wavy hair. & his uniform? No wrinkles. None.
It looked like he didn’t move a muscle in that - no wrinkles! Not even those lines you have when you sit on it.
He had a Rolex - a Rolex, I swear. Not a Swatch - on his left hand, meaning he’s a right-handed guy.
He looked like a Model Student - something which showed that you could be a winner & a loser at the same time.
But since when were Model Students so… Attractive? The guy’s teeth were straight & white - which explains the absence of braces. He had clear skin, but just a few freckles sprinkled over his nose.
The eyes were the most interesting - sharp. Razor sharp with that tinge of green in the blue, blue eyes.
“What’s so funny?” he whispered, his voice low & rough. “N-nothing. It’s just…” I trailed off with a new batch of giggles. “It’s true!” he protested in that soft voice.
I laughed again & he laughed with me. We didn’t even get into trouble because the prefects & the other students were too busy laughing at the sight of the Chairwoman hopping around the stage.
“& so, the rabbit-” “Hare! Hare!” the guy next to me said again. “- vowed never to take things for granted.” the Chairwoman ended & the students went wild with unneccessary claps & whistles.
“So, children. What is the moral of the story?” she asked. The guy next to me instantly raised his hand before the others.
“You, boy. Next to that girl.” the Chairwoman said, pointing at our direction.
Immediately, I could feel everyone staring and grinning at me.
I have mentinoed that I’m one of those notorious students - so everyone was grinning at me because was sitting next to this incredibly good-looking guy.
& he didn’t happen to be my ex.
“Yes, well. No, I’m not answering your question, ma’am. I just wanted to point out that the title of the story is the Tortoise & the Hare. Not the Rabbit & the Tortoise.”
Pin-drop silence filled the atmosphere of the hall when he sat down. Suddenly, some joker began to clap & the audience clapped too.
To my greater surprise, the Chairwoman clapped too, laughing.
“My dear boy, I see that I am wrong.” she said with a smile. He beamed back at her.
When we were dismissed, I whispered to his back, “How’d you do that?” “Do what?” he whispered, his back still facing me as we got up. “How’d you get the guts to do something a big of a joke like that & not get caught? Suspended?” “Because I didn’t ask a stupid question. & I think that it’s better if she knew the truth then to live a lie.”
That was the last thing I heard from him when we went our seperate ways - him down the stairs, me walking ahead.
“So… Iz? What was with you & the guy?” he said casually as I took my tray & searched for an empty table. “Me & who?” I asked distractedly as I found a nice, clean table. “The blondie! Blonde boy & that correction of his!” Mark said exasperatedly, swinging his arms up & down, making a point.
“Oh, right.” I said & walked faster towards my table, hoping no one would get there first. “Nothing.” I said as I munched on a biscuit.
“Right. Nothing.” he said with a grin.
You know, I don’t see why it was his business. Did we not break up last summer? Didn’t we?
I pointed it out - the whole him-being-my-ex but he kept grinning & pretended not to hear me.
“But you look pretty chummy with the guy. I mean, the way you two keep looking at each other. I used to look at you like that, you know.” he said.
Seriously. Why was I having this conversation with him? Him of all people? My ex.
Again, I voiced out my thoughts & yet again, he ignored me.
“What look?” I asked exasperatedly, wishing that he’d just go away. “What look? Are you saying we kept glancing each other of The Look? Hello, Mark! We just met at assembly - & you know, I don’t even know his name!”
“So? Love’s weird, you know.”
“Love?! I just broke up with you & here we are at the caf, you thinking I’m falling in love for some guy who pointed out to our Chairwoman that she was wrong about The Tortoise & the Hare?” I said & got up, put my tray away & left him there.
I didn’t see him much the following Monday. Same goes for the Monday after that.
Not like I was searching for him or anything… Much.
& not just on Mondays (whoops!), but also on Tuesdays, Wednesdays, Thursdays & Fridays.
Come to think of it, I have never seen him outside of that hall ever since then.
The next Monday, I gave up on my frantic search of the blonde guy. I decided that it was a waste of time, all that primping hair stuff & applying lip balm - yes, lip balm as the Dar’n Academy (that’s what the students call it) does not allow cosmetics.
& yes, we get fined if we ever dare to put on eyeshadow or even a hint of lipgloss.
Honestly, I wasn’t even paying attention to my surroundings - I wasn’t trying to search for a blonde, tall guy in the crowd anymore because it’s just not worth it.
Again, it’s not like I fell for him or anything. Please! I only talked to him once. & that was about The Tortoise & the Hare. Mui romantic.
Um, not.
“Over here, please.” a tall prefect - May, I think. She helped me with my RPP (Rubbish Picking Patrol) once - said, pointing to the Middies.
I perked up then because I’ve decided that Monday that the Middies were the first sign of good luck.
Superstitious & stupid though it may sound, it was proven to be true.
I sat down & felt a little snug between two guys. Finally, we stood up to sing the national anthem & the school’s song.
For a weird reason, I could sense something… I dunno, familiar near me. I didn’t realise what it was until after the singing.
Guess who?
“Hey.” he whispered to me with a grin. “Hey.” I said back & wished that i had tied my hair nicely like the previous Monday. “Long time no see.” “I know.” Dammit! Why did I say that? I’m supposed to be the cool, collected one. Not him.
I mean, yea. Him too but… Forget it.
He grinned even wider, showing off his straight, white teeth like they do in those Colgate ads.
The familiar sounds of a woman’s high heels hitting against the wooden floors echoed the hall. We all turned around to glimpse our chairwoman, striding with confidence & elegance.
“Good morning, dear students. Today we have a little show to show to you.” she said into the mike.
Right after her words left her mouth, two things happened.
The silence of the hall evolved into buzzings of whispers & excited giggles of the students - yes, it is a true treat to watch something with the video projector during assemblies.
Another, the guy next to me, Blonde, groaned & sank his face into his hands.
‘What’s the deal?’ I thought & shrugged it off as the lights were dimmed like in the theatres.
The hall was in pin-drop silence - you could practically hear the humming of the video projector!
The screen went blank momentarily & at the time, Blonde gave a sigh of relief, for a reason I didn’t know of.
Something flickered on the screen & a video appeared. Starring… Blonde himself!
Talk about dead embarrassing.
But if it wasn’t for the fact that he was holding a guitar - a pretty fine guitar, may I add - & started strumming chords while singing along, I’d have started laughing.
Instead, I was just gaping & thinking how nice his voice sounded.
Why did they had to show that goddamn embarrassing show? If I’d known that they would show it during assembly - especially when I know that she is sitting right next to me again, I’d have never go on that talk show for Africa. Really.
But she looked stunned. I couldn’t blame her. She was sitting next to the guy on that interview show who was promoting the news that he went to Africa to perform for the orphans.
If I do say so myself.
If only I knew who she was…
Why did he look so good? Even better than Mark. & it took me a longtime to get over I’m.
& that’s saying something!
Seriously. He looked different in a good way. Why did I keep looking at him? Why couldn’t I just ignore the guy who was extremely cute in the whole blonde-clean look & singing in that show?
God. If only I knew who he was…
The moment we were dismissed, I whispered, “Hey, what’s your name?” She looked at me, kind of startled to me talking to me. “Iz.” she said with a smile. “You?” “Me? Isaac.” I smiled back. “Never seen you around.”
Bold. I never knew I could be bold.
“Right back atcha. I’m in Year 8. You?”
I can’t believe it. She’s a year younger than me - but she looked so mature! She didn’t even care that nearly half of her hair was coming out from her messy ponytail & her fingernails were clear - no pink polish or anything.
The only hint of feminism were earstuds & her glossy red lips, glowing healthily, I couldn’t help noticing.
“Nine. Eight… You seem mature.” I voiced out my thoughts.
She grinned. We were already outside of the hall & standing amidst the bustling crowd of rowdy students.
“Excuse me, please go to your classrooms.” a prefect said behind me.
‘Shut up.’ I thought in my head & quickly felt the guilt rising up in my throat. That was the first time I ever thought back to a prefect.
I nodded instead & looked at my watch.
“Damn. Lee’s class is on now.” I said under my breath.
Her face blushed but she was still smiling.
“Yea, now’s Games for us. Catch you later?” she said & I gave her a nod. She smiled & turned towards the staircase, blending in with the crowd.
I went the other way.
I didn’t see him at the canteen again. It’s really annoying. I sat alone at a table, doodling in my notebook - not a diary-type of person - while munching on some snacks I bought.
Mark plopped down next to me, with a girl who looked familiar.
It wasn’t a very nice tradition I was looking forward to, I thought.
I looked at the familiar-looking girl closely & realised who she was - the girl who always hung out during Mark’s football practise
She was his stalker, his groupie. Something to feed my ex’s ego.
Harsh as it sounded, it was true.
“Hmm… I guess you found out who the blondie is?” Mark asked with a grin. “Huh? What?” I said, getting my head out of the clouds. “I said… I guess you found out the blondie’s name? Mrs Isaac?” he said, trying not to laugh.
I looked down at my doodle & felt my face heat up. I wasn’t the type who’d scribble the married names of their crushes! I mean, talk about childish. & there I was, a paper in my hand scribbled with the words, Mrs Isaac or Mrs Iz Isaac & a few hearts sprinkled on it.
God. What was happening to me?
Mark left after he finished his lunch - he was a fast-eater - & the girl leaned closer to me & whispered something to me. “Congrats for finding your One.”
We shared a smile - I didn’t know why I was smiling but my lips automatically lifted up hearing her congradulations - & she went over to Mark. She looked my way & winked.
Maybe Groupie Girl’s found her One, too.
I was running late for class. Why, oh why did that prefect have to fine me just because I was running at the corridors?
Everyone does it! I mean, have they not seen the footballers practising in the hallways?
It was so unfair that I always get caught & the crime was still on! I swore under my breath when I was out of said prefect’s reach & started running all over again.
Just as I turned a corner - very tricky, you kinda have to lean on your right to not slip - I ran into someone.
Books & papers flew everywhere. If it were one of those cartoons, little stars & cuckoo birds would’ve been shown in the blank air too.
My heart was beating fast - out of adrenaline, regret & panic - & inwardly, I was praying that it wasn’t another prefect ready to fine me again when their companion has already struck.
“Sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry…” I said over & over again as I helped the victim pick up his/her books. As I gave it to the victim, I looked up & saw Isaac.
His eyes were so sharp, so blue, so hypnotic, I just kept staring back into the depths of it. I blanked out.
“Iz? Iz? Are you alright?” I heard him say, his voice low & deep. “Yea.” I nodded. He smiled & looked down.
His hands were full with my books & mine with his.
We laughed quietly & passed the books to one another, careful not to drop it again.
“Are you late for something?” he asked me. “Yea. I always am.” I said, giving a sheepish smile.
We shared a smile for a minute or two until a girl’s voice from behind purred, “Zack, we’re late for it.”
I looked over his shoulder & dropped my books. The sight of possibly Ms Darren Academy caught me off guard. It was rare to see someone looking so gorgeous in a school uniform - especially if it was a blue skirt & white blouse.
She had a matching watch on her slim wrist & her hair was crop-cut short, bobbing up & down as she purred again.
“Come on, Zack. We can’t be late.”
‘Zack? Zack? He’s Isaac, not Zack, you little…’ I fumed in my head.
I felt something warm over my hand & looked down. Isaac’s hand was ontop of mine - on purpose or by accident, I didn’t know.
Didn’t care.
I snatched my hand away from his grasp, picked up my books & stood up. “I’m late.” I said & walked off, trying to look calm & collected as I’d always hoped to be, hoping that the tears wouldn’t burst out like a leaking dam.
“You just had to do that, Jenny!” I half-yelled, flailing my arms around like a blind bat.
“We were late, Zack.” she said, leaning against the board coolly.
The classroom was empty, deserted. The meeting had been over & we were the only ones there, cleaning up the mess the members of the Environment club made.
“Yea, but you didn’t have to be like that! I can’t believe you’d stoop so low, Jenny!” I yelled again & slammed my fist against the closest table.
The thud! echoed in the emptiness of the room.
Finally. Jenny had finally shut up.
I looked up & saw her on the verge of tears. I didn’t care. She deserved it - why did she have to be so… So annoying? Why?
Didn’t I tell her we were over? So why was she still clinging on?
I stormed out & just because I still had the leftover anger, I slammed the door, hoping the sound would echo just like it did my fist.
I didn’t see her. I couldn’t find her. Except for that day in the canteen. I bumped into her when it was a busy day there, the crowd hustling over each other to get their meal first without spilling it.
I bumped into her & she muttered, “Sorry.” & went off.
Of course I wasn’t an idiot not to follow her. I followed her. But she walked in twists & turns, that finally, I couldn’t see her anymore.
I was stupid. Stupid, stupid, stupid. Why did I keep doing that to myself? Why do I keep falling for inappropriate guys? Why can’t, just one in my life, I find a sweet guy who does not think about himself & where his jockey-shirt is?
& if I did find him, why couldn’t he be single - just vacant for me?
Why? Is it some sort of curse? Maybe it runs in the family. I mean, my mom’s a single mom & she’s already on her 18th boyfriend since the divorce - which was only 2 months ago.
Is it because I’m some sort of guy-repellant? Is that it? I reek of some unearthly smell to repel guys instead of attracting them?
Guys are stupid.
I avoided him for nearly 3 weeks - everywhere I lay eyes on him, I avoid his gaze & act as if he was a stranger to me.
It was as if he was everywhere, now. Right after when I didn’t want to see him, I see him.
It hurts to me. It hurts to ignore that guy I sat next to - who showed his passionate love for The Tortoise & the Hare. It hurts to ignore that guy I saw strumming the guitar & singing about trees.
It just hurts.
I was running late for an assembly - surprise, surprise.
At the time, I didn't quite care or worry whether I'd bump into him or not because I was way behind schedule - I had three minutes to spare to adjust everything - from my tie, to my hair, to the knot on my shoelaces.
"Hurry up, please." a prefect said in a hushed voice. I brushed past him, hoping that there'd be some sort of bruise on his foot when I stomped by accident.
Oops.
I was desperately searching for a seat - I finally found one, but it was all the way to my right. So, I had to settle for manhandling my own chair & sitting next to some guy who probably stayed up playing Halo or whatever, since he couldn't open his eyes properly.
After the same ol' stuff - "Good morning, students! Have you eaten your breakfast today?" - she got down to business.
Pictures of luscious green trees glowed onto the wall from the projector. We all looked at it - wondering what in hell was happening? Was the projector on the fritz? - & the theme abruptly changed.
From healthy-looking, exotic trees blooming everywhere to pictures of dry land, soil erosion, tree stumps sprinkled everywhere.
It was depressing, knowing that mankind did that to the planet. The Chairwoman was only too glad to point that out.
Suddenly, I spotted a familiar-looking figure - it was Isaac!
Uh... I mean, it was Isaac.
Only he didn't have that goofy smile on his role-model face. Instead, he had a grim look of death plastered on it.
His shoulders were broad, I noticed, but they slumped when he viewed the slideshow.
He was holding a too-familiar-looking guitar in his hands. Soon, the Chairwoman said, "Give a big hand to... Isaac Moh!"
The students in my row cheered like mad, some even began chanting, "Zaaack, Zaaaaack!"
Which, yea, was dead embarrassing. They were older than me, remember that.
He sat on a chair which was put in the middle of the stage & the hall lights dimmed, the spotlight shining on him.
It brought out the blonde highlights of his hair, I couldn't help but think.
"It's not fair,
Life's not fair.
We shouldn't be this cruel.
If only you knew...
What you saw,
was no illusion.
What you think,
was just fiction.
Why can't you see,
something's wrong.
Why aren't we doing
Anything to save it?" he sang, gloomy chords echoing.
Tears were threatening to spill - I could feel it.
It was as if he was talking about... Us.
& the trees. Don't forget the trees.
But still. He was looking at me when he sang & we gazed at each other because his grip on me was iron-strong.
I looked down all of a sudden & developed a sudden interest to my nails.
"Thank you." his soft yet deep voice rumbled.
The girls (audibly) sighed & the guys (audibly) yawned.
I was probably the only student quiet, not knowing whether to sigh, yawn or - my option - cry.
At the time, I didn't quite care or worry whether I'd bump into him or not because I was way behind schedule - I had three minutes to spare to adjust everything - from my tie, to my hair, to the knot on my shoelaces.
"Hurry up, please." a prefect said in a hushed voice. I brushed past him, hoping that there'd be some sort of bruise on his foot when I stomped by accident.
Oops.
I was desperately searching for a seat - I finally found one, but it was all the way to my right. So, I had to settle for manhandling my own chair & sitting next to some guy who probably stayed up playing Halo or whatever, since he couldn't open his eyes properly.
After the same ol' stuff - "Good morning, students! Have you eaten your breakfast today?" - she got down to business.
Pictures of luscious green trees glowed onto the wall from the projector. We all looked at it - wondering what in hell was happening? Was the projector on the fritz? - & the theme abruptly changed.
From healthy-looking, exotic trees blooming everywhere to pictures of dry land, soil erosion, tree stumps sprinkled everywhere.
It was depressing, knowing that mankind did that to the planet. The Chairwoman was only too glad to point that out.
Suddenly, I spotted a familiar-looking figure - it was Isaac!
Uh... I mean, it was Isaac.
Only he didn't have that goofy smile on his role-model face. Instead, he had a grim look of death plastered on it.
His shoulders were broad, I noticed, but they slumped when he viewed the slideshow.
He was holding a too-familiar-looking guitar in his hands. Soon, the Chairwoman said, "Give a big hand to... Isaac Moh!"
The students in my row cheered like mad, some even began chanting, "Zaaack, Zaaaaack!"
Which, yea, was dead embarrassing. They were older than me, remember that.
He sat on a chair which was put in the middle of the stage & the hall lights dimmed, the spotlight shining on him.
It brought out the blonde highlights of his hair, I couldn't help but think.
"It's not fair,
Life's not fair.
We shouldn't be this cruel.
If only you knew...
What you saw,
was no illusion.
What you think,
was just fiction.
Why can't you see,
something's wrong.
Why aren't we doing
Anything to save it?" he sang, gloomy chords echoing.
Tears were threatening to spill - I could feel it.
It was as if he was talking about... Us.
& the trees. Don't forget the trees.
But still. He was looking at me when he sang & we gazed at each other because his grip on me was iron-strong.
I looked down all of a sudden & developed a sudden interest to my nails.
"Thank you." his soft yet deep voice rumbled.
The girls (audibly) sighed & the guys (audibly) yawned.
I was probably the only student quiet, not knowing whether to sigh, yawn or - my option - cry.***
We all cheered - well, the girls cheered. His rowdy friends cheered along too but being all macho reserved about it.
He sat at the far end, away from me.
Even though we were at the opposite ends, I could feel his gaze burning intensely to my head.
"Iz! Iz!" I heard him yell, ignoring the prefects' "Don't yell in the hallways please!" & "Don't run please!"
Biggest bet was that he was chasing me.
Whatever. Doesn't he have that purring machine of his? Huh? Why did he want me when he's got that Ms Darren Academy?
What is he, some weirdo school playboy who was messing with me? Was that it?
I pushed my way through the bustling crowd, trying my best to walk as fast as I can before the stupid tears blur my vision.
"Iz..." I said, holding a crunched-up manuscript book in my hand.
I can see her messy-haired head a mile away, walking with the crowd.
The dismissal bell rang & I grabbed my bag & rushed out of the classroom & headed straight to the linkbridge.
"Iz, wait!" I heard a voice - I turned around with my heart full of hope. The minute I saw my ex, my heart just deflated.
"What was that about? I mean, you don't usually act like that - making a scene." Mark asked, tagging along behind me.
"It's nothing." I grunted.
"It is something." he said & put a shoulder on my hand.
"Look. I may be your ex. But that doesn't mean I'm not your friend." he said, his hand still on my shoulder.
"It's nothing." I said again.
"I'm the guy here. & guys have an international code. The look on his face when you ran outta there? That was the look kids have when their dogs die."
I kept silent, not knowing what to say.
In a strange & metaphorical way, he made sense.
"Don't kill his dog." he said & walked away.
My mom was late.
It was a good thing too. I was still looking for her.
Some time after, I caught a sight of that hair - the cork-spiral rustic hair. The girl sporting the hair was putting her head in between of her knees & her back was rising up & down, indicating heavy breathing.
Maybe I'm not late enough, just in time.
"Iz? Iz?" I heard a deep voice rumble.
I refused to let myself be all stupid & gooey just hearing that voice - that voice who was singing a song about trees.
I looked up & thanked that I don't like wearing eyeliner - or else not only having tears streaked across my cheeks, I'll also have the added bonus of black mascara flowing.
"Iz... Haven't seen you in awhile." Isaac said, ignoring the tears.
Which was good. I kinda hated people who treated me like an alien when I cry - only because of the rarity of the prospect that I'd cry.
Me. The tough girl who comes late & didn't give a damn to prefects' fuss on my hair.
Crying.
"Yea well... I've been busy." I shrugged.
"Oh."
Awkward silence filled the air. I looked behind to glimpse that we were all alone - well, okay, not really alone. The security guards & a bunch of teachers were still loitering at the school gates.
But other than that, we were the only ones there.
"You know... About Jenny... Remember that girl who was... You know?" he asked, peering closely.
Okay, here it comes. Here comes the, "Yea, well. She's my girlfriend. So I'm sorry, we're just friends."
I was expecting it - in fact, I already thought of the perfect shrug for the statement & master the tone when I'd say, "Cool."
But he completely threw me off when he said, "Yea. We're not... Together."
I gaped at him - I couldn't help it.
Where was the "Sorry, my girlfriend told me to tell you 'Back off'"?
Or even something closer, like, "You're just not anywhere near my age"?
Was it my imagination or was he edging closer to me as he said sheepishly, "We've known each other since Year 1. &, you know... She gets intimidated. It's not often to see a girl talking to me."?
"I don't see how that can be true." she said huskily to me.
I looked up from my muffed shoes & I was staring at her lips. I just stared & stared - her lips were nice-looking. Soft, moist, red.
When she smiled, her lips looked even softer, moister, redder.
"I just wanna say..." After a long time of staring at her lips, I finally managed to continue my sentence. "... That I'm sorry."
"Why?"
"Because... It's my fault you got hurt &-"
"It wasn't your fault. It was..."
"Jenny's." I smiled.
"Jenny's." she smiled back.
We sat there, smiling to each other until she said, "I like your song."
& that was when I kissed her.
I shall never forget my first kiss with him - his face was hovering above mine, his lips a breath away from mine.
Finally - FINALLY - our lips clashed.
It was a different kiss. But the nice kind of different.
It was tender, sweet. & it felt like he was singing that song of his when we were kissing.
Not only was he a talented guy - what with the guitar & all - he was the perfect boyfriend.
The new environment club - or called the Tree Hugging Club amongst the students - was awesome!
We planted over two thousand trees at the Darren All-Girls' Academy school. It was spine-breaking but looking at the tree stumps just standing in the soil made me proud to know that we all planted it.
Finally, after two thousand seedlings being planted into the soil, I wiped my forehead with the back of my gardening gloves.
Suddenly, someone said behind me, "Hey, Zack."
I knew that voice - it was my girlfriend (that's right, my girlfriend), Iz, or Isabelle. I turned around & got the shock of my life when cold water got squirted into my face.
I chased her around & around. Finally, I caught up with her & tackled her to the ground. We lay there, giggling like maniacs.
She propped herself up & gave a kiss to me.
I love this.
So there I was, walking down the old hill to the school gates, early-late as usual (early-late’s my term of being late but considered early in my book. Hence, early-late).
Other seniors past me by, rushing to make it before 7:45 in the morning, which I don’t get. I mean, why bother rushing when you just know you’re not gonna make it?
The bag on my shoulders were swinging, right, left, right, left.
It was something like strolling - only not at a park but the school’s hill, approaching the school gate.
“Excuse me?” a prefect said, stopping me. “Yea?” I said, feigning innocence. “Where’s your IDC?” she asked.
IDC was our school Identity Card. So that, instead of asking what’s your name & all that, you can just take a look at the ol’ card & nod & say what a nice name you have.
That’s what Mrs Jones kept saying anyway.
In other words, it’s just to make us an easier target for giving us fines by the prefects.
“Oh. Well, I didn’t bring it.” I said calmly. “Well, I’m afraid I’d have to give you a fine. What’s your name, please?” the prefect asked.
I gave her the details - name & class.
While I was telling her all that, I was fancying this whole James Bond scenario. You know, where James Bond goes all macho, facing the villain, saying his trademark line : “The name’s Bond. James Bond.” & the villain’d say, “Well, I’m afraid I’d have to kill you.”
It kinda makes the scene more exciting instead of facing some boring senior, giving you fines. I mean, really.
Typical day, the thought kept echoing in my head while I just hummed a happy tune.
“Hurry up, please.” one or two prefects said to me as I past by them, dropping my bag on the floor, near the classroom door & rushing up the staircase while putting on the blue-striped blazer, adjusting my tie, displaying my IDC.
“Hurry up, please.” another prefect said as I went into the hallway.
I tried my best not to roll my eyes. Who knew? Maybe there’s this rule against rolling your eyes at higher authority figures.
I went into the hall & tried my best not to smile at the familiar surroundings - the rowdy students, all restless waiting for the Chairman of our school to arrive. The prefects giving fines to said restless students. & us, the latecomers - most notorious of all was me. If there was this secret gathering place for prefects, I’d have been blacklisted, a black & white picture of me hung in the “Late-comers” hall of fame.
Still smiling, I lined up behind a few boys, taller than me. Meaning, they’re older than me. Because as far as I’m concerned, there was no boy taller than me & happened to be my age.
Except for Garrett, of course. But hey, he’s always tall & he’s already with what’s-her-name.
The prefects ushered us to these seats, which I’ve labelled Middies because, it’s smack right in the middle - perfect for private whispers & snickers. The prefects would be too caught up with the other students making noise at the side.
Yes, us students have a strategy. It was really rare at that time that I actually got to sit in the Middies. It’s like every students’ dream to sit there & I was taking my seat at the dream spot with people I didn’t know then.
I was feeling a little uncomfortable. I mean, c’mon. Like you wouldn’t get uncomfortable when sitting in between of two older guys, who, might I add, were complete strangers to me?
One was busy occupying himself with his other friend on his left. The other on my right was looking equally uncomfortable, fidgeting with the black buttons on his blazer.
“Students, please rise.” a prefect’s voice bounced off the walls. The students rose like zombies, probably still half-asleep.
“We will now sing the national anthem & the school song.” The familiar tune of a piano chimed & we all began to sing our country’s anthem.
Whenever I sang aloud, I couldn’t help but wonder why people kept looking at me (& I couldn’t help but feel please when I answer myself in my head).
Everyone kept turning around to look at me - including the guy on my right, to my immense pleasure.
After singing aloud, we stood up as the Chairwoman walked in the Hall, her stilletto heels click-clacking against the wooden floor.
She greeted us & we greeted her back, with the same sing-song voice we always put on to impress teachers.
It’s a tradition.
When we sat down, she began her weekly morning chirping - example : “So how are you students today? Have you had your breakfast? No? Do you know, dear students, that breakfast is the most important meal of the day?”
I said the last sentence at exactly the same time the chairwoman did. I got plenty of approving looks, majority of them reading, “Not bad, kid”. I had shrug my shoulders coolly at them. The only look I got different was from guy on my right - disapproving. I looked at him & he pretended that there was something rather intresting of his nails.
Nice try, bud.
From there, she strayed from the small talk & began talking about that day’s topic: Sportsmanship.
My school? Yea, very big on this whole sportsmanship deal. Of course, it also majors our education & our soul.
Meaning, the students of the Darren Academy were no headbangers or on crack.
We all groaned - inwardly & outwardly - & she just ignored it & continued her speech.
“As students of this academy, we are known for our sportsmanship.” she said, filled with gusto.
“We must never jeer or boo when there comes a time your house may lose a game. We are sportsman, dear students! Let me tell you a story with a moral to end with.”
We were all waiting for some really elaborate story of some kid losing to his best friend & they fought & little happy bunnies jump out & save the day! Whatever. Along the lines there.
What we didn’t expect was the story she was about to tell us…
“Do you know, dear students, the story of The Rabbit & the Tortoise?” she asked us.
That time, we made a noise twice the volume of our original sound.
She began her stories, impersonating high-pitched voices to deep, low ones. I mean, okay, that’d be enough for the lady’s dignity.
But why, oh why, did she have to do actions with her story? I mean, she even tried to jog on the spot with a suit!
A suit!
That was the woman who found our school - & there she was, jogging on the spot on the stage in her suit!
I don’t know her.
Then, the guy on my right started muttering furiously under his breath, “It’s the Tortoise & the Hare! The Tortoise & the Hare!”
At first, I thought he was suffering some sort of obsessive disease or something. Not alot of normal people get worked up over &-the-moral-of-the-story-is... stories.
People my age, I mean.
I looked at him & burst out in giggles. Really, giggles. That caught his attention & he looked at me with the expression I think I gave him. The what’s-up-with-her? look.
You’d probably do the same, you’re wondering why I went into fits of giggles, right? I mean, if you saw him, you wouldn’t expect furious muttering from that kind.
He’s the kind who looked like he had never forgotten his homework, books, uniform. His blonde hair was crisp - neat-crisp. No mohawk, no mullet. Just crisp, wavy hair. & his uniform? No wrinkles. None.
It looked like he didn’t move a muscle in that - no wrinkles! Not even those lines you have when you sit on it.
He had a Rolex - a Rolex, I swear. Not a Swatch - on his left hand, meaning he’s a right-handed guy.
He looked like a Model Student - something which showed that you could be a winner & a loser at the same time.
But since when were Model Students so… Attractive? The guy’s teeth were straight & white - which explains the absence of braces. He had clear skin, but just a few freckles sprinkled over his nose.
The eyes were the most interesting - sharp. Razor sharp with that tinge of green in the blue, blue eyes.
“What’s so funny?” he whispered, his voice low & rough. “N-nothing. It’s just…” I trailed off with a new batch of giggles. “It’s true!” he protested in that soft voice.
I laughed again & he laughed with me. We didn’t even get into trouble because the prefects & the other students were too busy laughing at the sight of the Chairwoman hopping around the stage.
“& so, the rabbit-” “Hare! Hare!” the guy next to me said again. “- vowed never to take things for granted.” the Chairwoman ended & the students went wild with unneccessary claps & whistles.
“So, children. What is the moral of the story?” she asked. The guy next to me instantly raised his hand before the others.
“You, boy. Next to that girl.” the Chairwoman said, pointing at our direction.
Immediately, I could feel everyone staring and grinning at me.
I have mentinoed that I’m one of those notorious students - so everyone was grinning at me because was sitting next to this incredibly good-looking guy.
& he didn’t happen to be my ex.
“Yes, well. No, I’m not answering your question, ma’am. I just wanted to point out that the title of the story is the Tortoise & the Hare. Not the Rabbit & the Tortoise.”
Pin-drop silence filled the atmosphere of the hall when he sat down. Suddenly, some joker began to clap & the audience clapped too.
To my greater surprise, the Chairwoman clapped too, laughing.
“My dear boy, I see that I am wrong.” she said with a smile. He beamed back at her.
When we were dismissed, I whispered to his back, “How’d you do that?” “Do what?” he whispered, his back still facing me as we got up. “How’d you get the guts to do something a big of a joke like that & not get caught? Suspended?” “Because I didn’t ask a stupid question. & I think that it’s better if she knew the truth then to live a lie.”
That was the last thing I heard from him when we went our seperate ways - him down the stairs, me walking ahead.
“So… Iz? What was with you & the guy?” he said casually as I took my tray & searched for an empty table. “Me & who?” I asked distractedly as I found a nice, clean table. “The blondie! Blonde boy & that correction of his!” Mark said exasperatedly, swinging his arms up & down, making a point.
“Oh, right.” I said & walked faster towards my table, hoping no one would get there first. “Nothing.” I said as I munched on a biscuit.
“Right. Nothing.” he said with a grin.
You know, I don’t see why it was his business. Did we not break up last summer? Didn’t we?
I pointed it out - the whole him-being-my-ex but he kept grinning & pretended not to hear me.
“But you look pretty chummy with the guy. I mean, the way you two keep looking at each other. I used to look at you like that, you know.” he said.
Seriously. Why was I having this conversation with him? Him of all people? My ex.
Again, I voiced out my thoughts & yet again, he ignored me.
“What look?” I asked exasperatedly, wishing that he’d just go away. “What look? Are you saying we kept glancing each other of The Look? Hello, Mark! We just met at assembly - & you know, I don’t even know his name!”
“So? Love’s weird, you know.”
“Love?! I just broke up with you & here we are at the caf, you thinking I’m falling in love for some guy who pointed out to our Chairwoman that she was wrong about The Tortoise & the Hare?” I said & got up, put my tray away & left him there.
I didn’t see him much the following Monday. Same goes for the Monday after that.
Not like I was searching for him or anything… Much.
& not just on Mondays (whoops!), but also on Tuesdays, Wednesdays, Thursdays & Fridays.
Come to think of it, I have never seen him outside of that hall ever since then.
The next Monday, I gave up on my frantic search of the blonde guy. I decided that it was a waste of time, all that primping hair stuff & applying lip balm - yes, lip balm as the Dar’n Academy (that’s what the students call it) does not allow cosmetics.
& yes, we get fined if we ever dare to put on eyeshadow or even a hint of lipgloss.
Honestly, I wasn’t even paying attention to my surroundings - I wasn’t trying to search for a blonde, tall guy in the crowd anymore because it’s just not worth it.
Again, it’s not like I fell for him or anything. Please! I only talked to him once. & that was about The Tortoise & the Hare. Mui romantic.
Um, not.
“Over here, please.” a tall prefect - May, I think. She helped me with my RPP (Rubbish Picking Patrol) once - said, pointing to the Middies.
I perked up then because I’ve decided that Monday that the Middies were the first sign of good luck.
Superstitious & stupid though it may sound, it was proven to be true.
I sat down & felt a little snug between two guys. Finally, we stood up to sing the national anthem & the school’s song.
For a weird reason, I could sense something… I dunno, familiar near me. I didn’t realise what it was until after the singing.
Guess who?
“Hey.” he whispered to me with a grin. “Hey.” I said back & wished that i had tied my hair nicely like the previous Monday. “Long time no see.” “I know.” Dammit! Why did I say that? I’m supposed to be the cool, collected one. Not him.
I mean, yea. Him too but… Forget it.
He grinned even wider, showing off his straight, white teeth like they do in those Colgate ads.
The familiar sounds of a woman’s high heels hitting against the wooden floors echoed the hall. We all turned around to glimpse our chairwoman, striding with confidence & elegance.
“Good morning, dear students. Today we have a little show to show to you.” she said into the mike.
Right after her words left her mouth, two things happened.
The silence of the hall evolved into buzzings of whispers & excited giggles of the students - yes, it is a true treat to watch something with the video projector during assemblies.
Another, the guy next to me, Blonde, groaned & sank his face into his hands.
‘What’s the deal?’ I thought & shrugged it off as the lights were dimmed like in the theatres.
The hall was in pin-drop silence - you could practically hear the humming of the video projector!
The screen went blank momentarily & at the time, Blonde gave a sigh of relief, for a reason I didn’t know of.
Something flickered on the screen & a video appeared. Starring… Blonde himself!
Talk about dead embarrassing.
But if it wasn’t for the fact that he was holding a guitar - a pretty fine guitar, may I add - & started strumming chords while singing along, I’d have started laughing.
Instead, I was just gaping & thinking how nice his voice sounded.
Why did they had to show that goddamn embarrassing show? If I’d known that they would show it during assembly - especially when I know that she is sitting right next to me again, I’d have never go on that talk show for Africa. Really.
But she looked stunned. I couldn’t blame her. She was sitting next to the guy on that interview show who was promoting the news that he went to Africa to perform for the orphans.
If I do say so myself.
If only I knew who she was…
Why did he look so good? Even better than Mark. & it took me a longtime to get over I’m.
& that’s saying something!
Seriously. He looked different in a good way. Why did I keep looking at him? Why couldn’t I just ignore the guy who was extremely cute in the whole blonde-clean look & singing in that show?
God. If only I knew who he was…
The moment we were dismissed, I whispered, “Hey, what’s your name?” She looked at me, kind of startled to me talking to me. “Iz.” she said with a smile. “You?” “Me? Isaac.” I smiled back. “Never seen you around.”
Bold. I never knew I could be bold.
“Right back atcha. I’m in Year 8. You?”
I can’t believe it. She’s a year younger than me - but she looked so mature! She didn’t even care that nearly half of her hair was coming out from her messy ponytail & her fingernails were clear - no pink polish or anything.
The only hint of feminism were earstuds & her glossy red lips, glowing healthily, I couldn’t help noticing.
“Nine. Eight… You seem mature.” I voiced out my thoughts.
She grinned. We were already outside of the hall & standing amidst the bustling crowd of rowdy students.
“Excuse me, please go to your classrooms.” a prefect said behind me.
‘Shut up.’ I thought in my head & quickly felt the guilt rising up in my throat. That was the first time I ever thought back to a prefect.
I nodded instead & looked at my watch.
“Damn. Lee’s class is on now.” I said under my breath.
Her face blushed but she was still smiling.
“Yea, now’s Games for us. Catch you later?” she said & I gave her a nod. She smiled & turned towards the staircase, blending in with the crowd.
I went the other way.
I didn’t see him at the canteen again. It’s really annoying. I sat alone at a table, doodling in my notebook - not a diary-type of person - while munching on some snacks I bought.
Mark plopped down next to me, with a girl who looked familiar.
It wasn’t a very nice tradition I was looking forward to, I thought.
I looked at the familiar-looking girl closely & realised who she was - the girl who always hung out during Mark’s football practise
She was his stalker, his groupie. Something to feed my ex’s ego.
Harsh as it sounded, it was true.
“Hmm… I guess you found out who the blondie is?” Mark asked with a grin. “Huh? What?” I said, getting my head out of the clouds. “I said… I guess you found out the blondie’s name? Mrs Isaac?” he said, trying not to laugh.
I looked down at my doodle & felt my face heat up. I wasn’t the type who’d scribble the married names of their crushes! I mean, talk about childish. & there I was, a paper in my hand scribbled with the words, Mrs Isaac or Mrs Iz Isaac & a few hearts sprinkled on it.
God. What was happening to me?
Mark left after he finished his lunch - he was a fast-eater - & the girl leaned closer to me & whispered something to me. “Congrats for finding your One.”
We shared a smile - I didn’t know why I was smiling but my lips automatically lifted up hearing her congradulations - & she went over to Mark. She looked my way & winked.
Maybe Groupie Girl’s found her One, too.
I was running late for class. Why, oh why did that prefect have to fine me just because I was running at the corridors?
Everyone does it! I mean, have they not seen the footballers practising in the hallways?
It was so unfair that I always get caught & the crime was still on! I swore under my breath when I was out of said prefect’s reach & started running all over again.
Just as I turned a corner - very tricky, you kinda have to lean on your right to not slip - I ran into someone.
Books & papers flew everywhere. If it were one of those cartoons, little stars & cuckoo birds would’ve been shown in the blank air too.
My heart was beating fast - out of adrenaline, regret & panic - & inwardly, I was praying that it wasn’t another prefect ready to fine me again when their companion has already struck.
“Sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry…” I said over & over again as I helped the victim pick up his/her books. As I gave it to the victim, I looked up & saw Isaac.
His eyes were so sharp, so blue, so hypnotic, I just kept staring back into the depths of it. I blanked out.
“Iz? Iz? Are you alright?” I heard him say, his voice low & deep. “Yea.” I nodded. He smiled & looked down.
His hands were full with my books & mine with his.
We laughed quietly & passed the books to one another, careful not to drop it again.
“Are you late for something?” he asked me. “Yea. I always am.” I said, giving a sheepish smile.
We shared a smile for a minute or two until a girl’s voice from behind purred, “Zack, we’re late for it.”
I looked over his shoulder & dropped my books. The sight of possibly Ms Darren Academy caught me off guard. It was rare to see someone looking so gorgeous in a school uniform - especially if it was a blue skirt & white blouse.
She had a matching watch on her slim wrist & her hair was crop-cut short, bobbing up & down as she purred again.
“Come on, Zack. We can’t be late.”
‘Zack? Zack? He’s Isaac, not Zack, you little…’ I fumed in my head.
I felt something warm over my hand & looked down. Isaac’s hand was ontop of mine - on purpose or by accident, I didn’t know.
Didn’t care.
I snatched my hand away from his grasp, picked up my books & stood up. “I’m late.” I said & walked off, trying to look calm & collected as I’d always hoped to be, hoping that the tears wouldn’t burst out like a leaking dam.
“You just had to do that, Jenny!” I half-yelled, flailing my arms around like a blind bat.
“We were late, Zack.” she said, leaning against the board coolly.
The classroom was empty, deserted. The meeting had been over & we were the only ones there, cleaning up the mess the members of the Environment club made.
“Yea, but you didn’t have to be like that! I can’t believe you’d stoop so low, Jenny!” I yelled again & slammed my fist against the closest table.
The thud! echoed in the emptiness of the room.
Finally. Jenny had finally shut up.
I looked up & saw her on the verge of tears. I didn’t care. She deserved it - why did she have to be so… So annoying? Why?
Didn’t I tell her we were over? So why was she still clinging on?
I stormed out & just because I still had the leftover anger, I slammed the door, hoping the sound would echo just like it did my fist.
I didn’t see her. I couldn’t find her. Except for that day in the canteen. I bumped into her when it was a busy day there, the crowd hustling over each other to get their meal first without spilling it.
I bumped into her & she muttered, “Sorry.” & went off.
Of course I wasn’t an idiot not to follow her. I followed her. But she walked in twists & turns, that finally, I couldn’t see her anymore.
I was stupid. Stupid, stupid, stupid. Why did I keep doing that to myself? Why do I keep falling for inappropriate guys? Why can’t, just one in my life, I find a sweet guy who does not think about himself & where his jockey-shirt is?
& if I did find him, why couldn’t he be single - just vacant for me?
Why? Is it some sort of curse? Maybe it runs in the family. I mean, my mom’s a single mom & she’s already on her 18th boyfriend since the divorce - which was only 2 months ago.
Is it because I’m some sort of guy-repellant? Is that it? I reek of some unearthly smell to repel guys instead of attracting them?
Guys are stupid.
I avoided him for nearly 3 weeks - everywhere I lay eyes on him, I avoid his gaze & act as if he was a stranger to me.
It was as if he was everywhere, now. Right after when I didn’t want to see him, I see him.
It hurts to me. It hurts to ignore that guy I sat next to - who showed his passionate love for The Tortoise & the Hare. It hurts to ignore that guy I saw strumming the guitar & singing about trees.
It just hurts.
I was running late for an assembly - surprise, surprise.
At the time, I didn't quite care or worry whether I'd bump into him or not because I was way behind schedule - I had three minutes to spare to adjust everything - from my tie, to my hair, to the knot on my shoelaces.
"Hurry up, please." a prefect said in a hushed voice. I brushed past him, hoping that there'd be some sort of bruise on his foot when I stomped by accident.
Oops.
I was desperately searching for a seat - I finally found one, but it was all the way to my right. So, I had to settle for manhandling my own chair & sitting next to some guy who probably stayed up playing Halo or whatever, since he couldn't open his eyes properly.
After the same ol' stuff - "Good morning, students! Have you eaten your breakfast today?" - she got down to business.
Pictures of luscious green trees glowed onto the wall from the projector. We all looked at it - wondering what in hell was happening? Was the projector on the fritz? - & the theme abruptly changed.
From healthy-looking, exotic trees blooming everywhere to pictures of dry land, soil erosion, tree stumps sprinkled everywhere.
It was depressing, knowing that mankind did that to the planet. The Chairwoman was only too glad to point that out.
Suddenly, I spotted a familiar-looking figure - it was Isaac!
Uh... I mean, it was Isaac.
Only he didn't have that goofy smile on his role-model face. Instead, he had a grim look of death plastered on it.
His shoulders were broad, I noticed, but they slumped when he viewed the slideshow.
He was holding a too-familiar-looking guitar in his hands. Soon, the Chairwoman said, "Give a big hand to... Isaac Moh!"
The students in my row cheered like mad, some even began chanting, "Zaaack, Zaaaaack!"
Which, yea, was dead embarrassing. They were older than me, remember that.
He sat on a chair which was put in the middle of the stage & the hall lights dimmed, the spotlight shining on him.
It brought out the blonde highlights of his hair, I couldn't help but think.
"It's not fair,
Life's not fair.
We shouldn't be this cruel.
If only you knew...
What you saw,
was no illusion.
What you think,
was just fiction.
Why can't you see,
something's wrong.
Why aren't we doing
Anything to save it?" he sang, gloomy chords echoing.
Tears were threatening to spill - I could feel it.
It was as if he was talking about... Us.
& the trees. Don't forget the trees.
But still. He was looking at me when he sang & we gazed at each other because his grip on me was iron-strong.
I looked down all of a sudden & developed a sudden interest to my nails.
"Thank you." his soft yet deep voice rumbled.
The girls (audibly) sighed & the guys (audibly) yawned.
I was probably the only student quiet, not knowing whether to sigh, yawn or - my option - cry.
At the time, I didn't quite care or worry whether I'd bump into him or not because I was way behind schedule - I had three minutes to spare to adjust everything - from my tie, to my hair, to the knot on my shoelaces.
"Hurry up, please." a prefect said in a hushed voice. I brushed past him, hoping that there'd be some sort of bruise on his foot when I stomped by accident.
Oops.
I was desperately searching for a seat - I finally found one, but it was all the way to my right. So, I had to settle for manhandling my own chair & sitting next to some guy who probably stayed up playing Halo or whatever, since he couldn't open his eyes properly.
After the same ol' stuff - "Good morning, students! Have you eaten your breakfast today?" - she got down to business.
Pictures of luscious green trees glowed onto the wall from the projector. We all looked at it - wondering what in hell was happening? Was the projector on the fritz? - & the theme abruptly changed.
From healthy-looking, exotic trees blooming everywhere to pictures of dry land, soil erosion, tree stumps sprinkled everywhere.
It was depressing, knowing that mankind did that to the planet. The Chairwoman was only too glad to point that out.
Suddenly, I spotted a familiar-looking figure - it was Isaac!
Uh... I mean, it was Isaac.
Only he didn't have that goofy smile on his role-model face. Instead, he had a grim look of death plastered on it.
His shoulders were broad, I noticed, but they slumped when he viewed the slideshow.
He was holding a too-familiar-looking guitar in his hands. Soon, the Chairwoman said, "Give a big hand to... Isaac Moh!"
The students in my row cheered like mad, some even began chanting, "Zaaack, Zaaaaack!"
Which, yea, was dead embarrassing. They were older than me, remember that.
He sat on a chair which was put in the middle of the stage & the hall lights dimmed, the spotlight shining on him.
It brought out the blonde highlights of his hair, I couldn't help but think.
"It's not fair,
Life's not fair.
We shouldn't be this cruel.
If only you knew...
What you saw,
was no illusion.
What you think,
was just fiction.
Why can't you see,
something's wrong.
Why aren't we doing
Anything to save it?" he sang, gloomy chords echoing.
Tears were threatening to spill - I could feel it.
It was as if he was talking about... Us.
& the trees. Don't forget the trees.
But still. He was looking at me when he sang & we gazed at each other because his grip on me was iron-strong.
I looked down all of a sudden & developed a sudden interest to my nails.
"Thank you." his soft yet deep voice rumbled.
The girls (audibly) sighed & the guys (audibly) yawned.
I was probably the only student quiet, not knowing whether to sigh, yawn or - my option - cry.***
We all cheered - well, the girls cheered. His rowdy friends cheered along too but being all macho reserved about it.
He sat at the far end, away from me.
Even though we were at the opposite ends, I could feel his gaze burning intensely to my head.
"Iz! Iz!" I heard him yell, ignoring the prefects' "Don't yell in the hallways please!" & "Don't run please!"
Biggest bet was that he was chasing me.
Whatever. Doesn't he have that purring machine of his? Huh? Why did he want me when he's got that Ms Darren Academy?
What is he, some weirdo school playboy who was messing with me? Was that it?
I pushed my way through the bustling crowd, trying my best to walk as fast as I can before the stupid tears blur my vision.
"Iz..." I said, holding a crunched-up manuscript book in my hand.
I can see her messy-haired head a mile away, walking with the crowd.
The dismissal bell rang & I grabbed my bag & rushed out of the classroom & headed straight to the linkbridge.
"Iz, wait!" I heard a voice - I turned around with my heart full of hope. The minute I saw my ex, my heart just deflated.
"What was that about? I mean, you don't usually act like that - making a scene." Mark asked, tagging along behind me.
"It's nothing." I grunted.
"It is something." he said & put a shoulder on my hand.
"Look. I may be your ex. But that doesn't mean I'm not your friend." he said, his hand still on my shoulder.
"It's nothing." I said again.
"I'm the guy here. & guys have an international code. The look on his face when you ran outta there? That was the look kids have when their dogs die."
I kept silent, not knowing what to say.
In a strange & metaphorical way, he made sense.
"Don't kill his dog." he said & walked away.
My mom was late.
It was a good thing too. I was still looking for her.
Some time after, I caught a sight of that hair - the cork-spiral rustic hair. The girl sporting the hair was putting her head in between of her knees & her back was rising up & down, indicating heavy breathing.
Maybe I'm not late enough, just in time.
"Iz? Iz?" I heard a deep voice rumble.
I refused to let myself be all stupid & gooey just hearing that voice - that voice who was singing a song about trees.
I looked up & thanked that I don't like wearing eyeliner - or else not only having tears streaked across my cheeks, I'll also have the added bonus of black mascara flowing.
"Iz... Haven't seen you in awhile." Isaac said, ignoring the tears.
Which was good. I kinda hated people who treated me like an alien when I cry - only because of the rarity of the prospect that I'd cry.
Me. The tough girl who comes late & didn't give a damn to prefects' fuss on my hair.
Crying.
"Yea well... I've been busy." I shrugged.
"Oh."
Awkward silence filled the air. I looked behind to glimpse that we were all alone - well, okay, not really alone. The security guards & a bunch of teachers were still loitering at the school gates.
But other than that, we were the only ones there.
"You know... About Jenny... Remember that girl who was... You know?" he asked, peering closely.
Okay, here it comes. Here comes the, "Yea, well. She's my girlfriend. So I'm sorry, we're just friends."
I was expecting it - in fact, I already thought of the perfect shrug for the statement & master the tone when I'd say, "Cool."
But he completely threw me off when he said, "Yea. We're not... Together."
I gaped at him - I couldn't help it.
Where was the "Sorry, my girlfriend told me to tell you 'Back off'"?
Or even something closer, like, "You're just not anywhere near my age"?
Was it my imagination or was he edging closer to me as he said sheepishly, "We've known each other since Year 1. &, you know... She gets intimidated. It's not often to see a girl talking to me."?
"I don't see how that can be true." she said huskily to me.
I looked up from my muffed shoes & I was staring at her lips. I just stared & stared - her lips were nice-looking. Soft, moist, red.
When she smiled, her lips looked even softer, moister, redder.
"I just wanna say..." After a long time of staring at her lips, I finally managed to continue my sentence. "... That I'm sorry."
"Why?"
"Because... It's my fault you got hurt &-"
"It wasn't your fault. It was..."
"Jenny's." I smiled.
"Jenny's." she smiled back.
We sat there, smiling to each other until she said, "I like your song."
& that was when I kissed her.
I shall never forget my first kiss with him - his face was hovering above mine, his lips a breath away from mine.
Finally - FINALLY - our lips clashed.
It was a different kiss. But the nice kind of different.
It was tender, sweet. & it felt like he was singing that song of his when we were kissing.
Not only was he a talented guy - what with the guitar & all - he was the perfect boyfriend.
The new environment club - or called the Tree Hugging Club amongst the students - was awesome!
We planted over two thousand trees at the Darren All-Girls' Academy school. It was spine-breaking but looking at the tree stumps just standing in the soil made me proud to know that we all planted it.
Finally, after two thousand seedlings being planted into the soil, I wiped my forehead with the back of my gardening gloves.
Suddenly, someone said behind me, "Hey, Zack."
I knew that voice - it was my girlfriend (that's right, my girlfriend), Iz, or Isabelle. I turned around & got the shock of my life when cold water got squirted into my face.
I chased her around & around. Finally, I caught up with her & tackled her to the ground. We lay there, giggling like maniacs.
She propped herself up & gave a kiss to me.
I love this.
Tuesday, 6 March 2007
Raining
"Marsha, it's been a long time since you've been out there." was what my dad said to me.
I turned around & saw him frowning upon me sitting on my comfy study chair, messing around with my MacBook.
"Aw... But dad! It's just the last day of exams! I think I should have a little peace & quiet with my Mac." I wined.
"Yes, but when are you going to hae some time with Mother Nature?" he queried.
"What's that got to do with nature?! You're holding a squash raquet - don't think I can't see, dad!"
I don't know why but my dad's been bugging me to play squash since two weeks ago.
"Oh fine."
I changed to one of my big, baggy school shirt, grabbed a pair of trackbottoms & my raquet & I was off to go.
[bop bop]
"Nice score, Marsha!"
I grunted as I tried to reach for the ball, but it was too far away.
I fell on the floor & hit it furiously.
"Why can't I always hit the ball?!" I said, fuming.
Mostly, I can only hit the ball once. Just once.
Then, I'd miss it or it hit my head.
Either one.
"There's always next week." my dad said in that cheer-up! tone.
I grunted & wiped my forehead with the hand-towel I brought down as I glugged from the bottle of water.
As I was walking from the squash court to the lift, I noticed it was raining.
"Marsha, I'm going to buy some stuff. You go on ahead." my dad said & threw me the keys.
I caught it & gave a nod.
A few guys, damp from the rain (& the pool) were running & headed to the guys' toilet.
Except for one.
He was cute - tall, brown eyes shaddowed by his long-ish brown hair. He headed to the lift.
So there I was, standing next to a cute guy in a swimsuit, waiting for the lift at the lobby... In my sweaty clothes.
Hmm... Truly the idealistic time for "true love" to appear, right?
[Ding!]
The guy went in & opened the lift doors for me. I smiled & said, "Thank you"
... A little too loudly, I just realised.
Anyway, he smiled back at me - so cute! & not just the baby-cute. I'm talking about GUY-cute - & looked at me, up & down.
I wasn't watching him doing that - I just saw that at the corner of my eye.
He smiled to himself & I smirked back, "You look nice yourself."
At first, he looked kind of surprise. I don't know why but he did.
Maybe he didn't know I could speak English - asides the Thank You thing.
I don't blame him, really. I do look a little Asian-ish.
& besides, this condo is roaming with foreigners. Some people live here while others are just renting for a vacation.
He didn't even have the sincerity to blush!
'Hmm... Well, at least this guy is modest.' I thought sarcastically.
"So... you new 'round here?" he said.
I tried not to laugh at his casualness. I mean, who was he trying to kid?
I've been staying in this condo since I was just a toddler & I haven't seen him around the area.
So who, exactly, is the new kid here?
"Maybe." I said flirtily.
"Maybe you'd like to have a tour guide around. Just in case you don't get lost. This place is pretty big, you know."
"Maybe I will."
"Maybe you will."
We stared at each other for a while, a smile playing on his lips, & I was just as bad.
"Hey... Why aren't we moving?" I asked.
We both glanced at the touch panel & realised that we didn't press the level button.
We burst laughing as we pressed the level number we were on.
"Hmm... Level 10, eh? Well... I heard people related to 10 are very lucky." he said.
"Lucky me. I happen to be 10... Plus six."
He smiled.
"I get the better luck. I'm 10 plus eight."
"Lucky you."
"Lucky me."
[ding]
"Guess you've reached your house."
"Yep. Bye." I gave him a last smile before I left the lift.
I didn't see him for a while. I mean, it wasn't like I was waiting for him.
Much.
I keep peeking out at my window, hoping to see him swimming around with his friends. The first thought that came to mind as I reached my room after that lift incident was, 'No way is he going to see me in my swimsuit!'
& I shall be sticking to that resolution.
'Aw... What the heck?' I thought as I grabbed the squash racquet, which was standing at the closet door for so long.
"Bye, dad! I'm off to play some squash!" I yelled out, my voice bouncing off the walls, loud enough for my dad to hear.
I threw the rubber ball up into the air & swung the racquet like mad, only making me seem like the crazy one around.
'I hate squash.' I thought miserably. 'I hate squash & forever I will!'
As I thought of that, I threw the ball into the air & hit the ball. I hit it so hard that it bounced off the ceiling so fast, like a meteorite. I ran to a corner to try & hit it again, but I missed.
"Bravo." I heard a deep voice say behind me, with the sounds of clapping.
At first I thought it'd been my dad, trying to tease me with his best immitation of Pierce Brosnan.
But I turned around & realised it wasn't my dad. It was him.
"Hey." I said casually, even though inwardly, I was freaking out!
What guy talks to me?
Not a very sane one, I tell you.
"Hey." he said right back. I couldn't help noticing that his eyes seem to be the same colour as the pool - clear blue.
"So... You play squash." he said as-a-matter-of-factly.
"Yea. But I'm no Nicole Davidson." I said as I tried to do warm-up for my right hand.
"Maybe. But I am." he said.
Man, this guy really has no modesty.
"Oh really?" I teased.
"Yes." he teased back, coming closer towards me & whispered, "Here." in my ear as he hugged me, putting his arms around mine, his right hand on mine, his left in the air, throwing the ball up in the air.
As it was in mid-air, he quickly grabbed both my arms & swung it with force, hitting the ball, making it bounce off the wall.
It came hurtling towards us - towards me!
Just as it got dangerously close, he quickly went in front of me - with grace, I must add - & caught the rubber ball with his bare hand.
You know, if this were those cartoons, that puny little black ball would turn red & steam'd be coming out from the guy's hand.
Oooh. Very romantic.
Uh, not.
As the realisation dawned upon me, I started to jump & squeal, "I did it! I did it!" over & over again with excitement.
Hey, I can't help it.
It's the first time I've manage to hit that stupid ball... Gracefully.
& also my first time having a guy's arms around me.
"Wow." I breathed.
"Yea, I know." he said, looking a little smug.
"So, what? You swim & play squash? What are you, Mr. Fit 07?" I joked.
Was it me or did his face turned redder for 10 seconds?
"Yea, well, I'm multi-talented." he finally said after the mentioned time.
"So what else are you good at?" I smiled.
"I should be asking you." he smiled back.
"Hmm... Well, you can see, I suck in squash. But I pay back for swimming."
"Swimming? We'll see about that." he said & grinned.
"Wha-? No! I mean... Uh..."
But it was too late. The damage was done.
"I'll be down five more mins." I said & ran to the lift.
Whoot-whoooo
Well, okay, it doesn't really sound like that but that's as close as I can put the wolf-like whistle he gave me when he saw me in the swimsuit.
What was to whistle at? The swimsuit was just a one-piece.
But it is a swimsuit.
& I am a girl.
"Let's swim." I said & dived into the pool.
We've been hanging out alot eversince that day. I found out his name - Josh Cartwrite.
I mean, that suits him. He does look like a Josh.
Which is kinda weird because I don't even know how a Josh is supposed to look like.
So for nearly two weeks, we kept meeting up, either to play squash or to swim in the pool.
A week before the Monthly test, I was stuck in my room, studying at the desk near my window.
I couldn't help but look out of the window - it wasn't like I was expecting to see Josh climbing a ladder to my room or something. It was just out of habit - & that was when I saw him.
& her.
"Marshee? Open up, Marsha!" my mom said loudly while banging on the door.
I didn't move to open the door nor did I move a muscle.
I just sat there with my tub of Baskin Robbins in my lap, staring blankly into space.
"C'mon Marshee. It's not healthy, a young girl like you staying in that room." she kept saying.
But the truth is, it's his fault. I mean, what was he doing?
Was he trying to lead me on? Or is he just some sort of freaky playboy of the neighbourhood?
I could hear my parents arguing outside my room, my dad defending for me, saying that this ism y first heartbreak, my mom saying that there are plenty of more fishes in the sea - or something like that.
My mobile phone rang & I pounced on it like a leopard whichw as starving itself to death.
"Oh, Marsh! What're you doing?" I heard a girl's voice say in my ear.
"Making a strike for girls being led on by idiotic playboys, that's what." I said back.
"Do you want me to come over?" the girl said.
The tears began to spring out of my eyes & I nodded my head vigorously.
Then, I realised that she can't see me nodding my head so I said, "Yes." in a small voice.
"Okay. So open up." she said & a knock was heard on my door.
I opened it & there stood my best friend with open arms.
"So you saw the guy giving a girl a piggyback. So what?" Carol said to me.
Carol's an amazing girl who's Ms. Popular. & she's not the show-offy kind either.
She's the kind who cares about her grades & not about her pink heels having mud on it or whatever.
Not only is she great & smart & athletic, she also has a boyfriend.
Steady for 4 months, I think with Garett.
Like that dude from Eragon, Garrett.
But he's a nice guy, no drugs or piercing or tattoos on him.
So he's approved.
"Yea, but it was a pretty girl. & she looked his age." I sniffed, hoping that the mucus doesn't drop in the Choc&Chips flavoured ice-cream tub.
"So? I've read this article about this guy - um, what was his name? Chris Hawt or something like that. Yea, the dude got a scholarship to Oxford in England, this is his 2nd year, I think. His mom? 36 years old." Carol said, hopping on the bed.
"2nd year? That means he's... 20?! The mom got him when she was in high school?" I said, trying really hard not to scream.
"Prom night." Carol said knowingly.
"Believe me, that girl on Josh's back? Not his mother."
I mean, okay. A girl who had her son when she was 16. Sure, whatever.
But the girl I saw on his back? So not a motherly look.
She was our age & wearing a bikini strap.
& she looks like a model.
The really, really naturally pretty kind, which everyone hates.
Well, okay. Maybe not everyone. Maybe just me.
As I explained it to Carol, she just shook her head & held my hand & said, "Don't worry. Sooner or later, it's gonna work out. I mean, from the way you told me about how you guys met, it must be, like, fate or something. True love based on fate does not just muss up & never get fixed again."
I smiled at her & squeezed her hand.
So what if I don't have him? I've got Carol.
"Hey. They say that squash takes out the anger. Why don't you play a game, huh?" she said.
Every hit I took, I kept thinking of those images of Josh with that girl on his back in the pool.
Bop!
He was laughing with her.
I ran to the left to hit the ball.
Bop!
He kept swinging her on his back.
For a few minutes, I was in that room alone, running to this corner & that, hitting the ball with all my force of my right arm.
I could've kept on going for maybe a couple more minutes until suddenly, the lights went off just as I heard the thunder crack outside the condo.
I collapse on the floor & sink my head into my knees, sobbing, the tears finally coming out.
There were three things which I heard at the exact same time.
My sobbing.
The ball bobbing up & down gently on the wooden floor.
Footsteps.
I didn't bother looking up - hell, I didn't have enough energy to look up.
I kept sobbing & I felt someone sitting down next to me.
Finally, I looked up & saw the last person I wanted to see - or maybe the first?
I couldn't think too much. My head was hurting - & as corny as this sounds, so does my heart.
Josh was sitting next to me, just looking at me with confusion & yet, understanding.
"What're you doing here?" I said bitterly, looking at my feet in the dark.
"Hey to you too." he said with a grin.
Even though it was dark, I still could see him smile.
Damn him.
He got the hint & said, "Hey, what's the matter? You've been ignoring me for two weeks now. That's a long time, ya know."
"Well, I thought you needed space with your girlfriend." I snapped.
"What? Girlfriend? I don't have one."
"Oh yea? Well, who was that on your back two weeks ago?" I challenged, biting back the urge to ask whether it was his mom to prove Carol that she's wrong.
He looked flustered & stared at the ground.
The silence between us was tormenting. I felt like screaming at him but I didn't have the energy, like I said.
"She's... She's my cousin."
I snorted. "Yea. Cousin."
"Yes, she's my cousin." he said, a little more firmly.
I looked up into his eyes, my vision being a little blurred what with all the tears.
Finally, I just decided to trust him on this one because he was looking at me with... Something that makes me want to trust him forever.
"Why didn't you just tell me your cousin was a model lookalike?" I said.
He laughed & I cried at the same moment - how could I've been so stupid? Josh wasn't that kind of playboy freak.
He's a nice guy with a healthy amount of male ego in himself, is all.
How could've I just doubt that?
"Hey." he said softly, softer than the first time.
He came towards me & hugged me.
I stayed there in the dark, under his arms. Feeling protected from the real world.
As if he wouldn't let me in harm's way.
I looked up at him & he returned the look.
He brushed away a stray teardrop flowing to my chin & for a reason I couldn't think of, our faces were going closer & closer until we crashed into each other's lips.
My friends & I always played Truth & Dare. That time with Josh?
We were playing Truth&Kiss.
Each truth, reward with a kiss.
He admitted to me that he saw me coming out of the squash room & my dad walking away.
So he ran towards the elevator behind me, just to get to know me a little bit more.
He got a big kiss from me.
I told him how jealous I was when I saw his cousin - her name's Jamelia, by the way - & actually thought he was a playboy freak.
Big kiss from him.
But the nicest one was the last. The one where he said that he never felt this way for anyone before.
A really big one from me. & a long one too.
"Why isn't the lights on?" I asked as I came up for some air.
Because the rain's stopped so the electricity must be back on.
He gave me a smile & said, "Truth? I switched it off."
Another big one from me.
So here I am, watching Josh, Jamelia & this other guy from the neighbourhood splashing each other with water. Jamelia's being bullied by the two so I think I better rescue her from her fate.
But before I leave, I've just to tell you one last thing:
I'm Josh's official girlfriend - 2 months steady & already double-dated with Carol & Garrett.
& now, we sometimes hang out with Jamelia but most of the times? I play squash with Josh & sometimes switch the lights off.
Really, I love squash.
Especially in the dark.
I turned around & saw him frowning upon me sitting on my comfy study chair, messing around with my MacBook.
"Aw... But dad! It's just the last day of exams! I think I should have a little peace & quiet with my Mac." I wined.
"Yes, but when are you going to hae some time with Mother Nature?" he queried.
"What's that got to do with nature?! You're holding a squash raquet - don't think I can't see, dad!"
I don't know why but my dad's been bugging me to play squash since two weeks ago.
"Oh fine."
I changed to one of my big, baggy school shirt, grabbed a pair of trackbottoms & my raquet & I was off to go.
[bop bop]
"Nice score, Marsha!"
I grunted as I tried to reach for the ball, but it was too far away.
I fell on the floor & hit it furiously.
"Why can't I always hit the ball?!" I said, fuming.
Mostly, I can only hit the ball once. Just once.
Then, I'd miss it or it hit my head.
Either one.
"There's always next week." my dad said in that cheer-up! tone.
I grunted & wiped my forehead with the hand-towel I brought down as I glugged from the bottle of water.
As I was walking from the squash court to the lift, I noticed it was raining.
"Marsha, I'm going to buy some stuff. You go on ahead." my dad said & threw me the keys.
I caught it & gave a nod.
A few guys, damp from the rain (& the pool) were running & headed to the guys' toilet.
Except for one.
He was cute - tall, brown eyes shaddowed by his long-ish brown hair. He headed to the lift.
So there I was, standing next to a cute guy in a swimsuit, waiting for the lift at the lobby... In my sweaty clothes.
Hmm... Truly the idealistic time for "true love" to appear, right?
[Ding!]
The guy went in & opened the lift doors for me. I smiled & said, "Thank you"
... A little too loudly, I just realised.
Anyway, he smiled back at me - so cute! & not just the baby-cute. I'm talking about GUY-cute - & looked at me, up & down.
I wasn't watching him doing that - I just saw that at the corner of my eye.
He smiled to himself & I smirked back, "You look nice yourself."
At first, he looked kind of surprise. I don't know why but he did.
Maybe he didn't know I could speak English - asides the Thank You thing.
I don't blame him, really. I do look a little Asian-ish.
& besides, this condo is roaming with foreigners. Some people live here while others are just renting for a vacation.
He didn't even have the sincerity to blush!
'Hmm... Well, at least this guy is modest.' I thought sarcastically.
"So... you new 'round here?" he said.
I tried not to laugh at his casualness. I mean, who was he trying to kid?
I've been staying in this condo since I was just a toddler & I haven't seen him around the area.
So who, exactly, is the new kid here?
"Maybe." I said flirtily.
"Maybe you'd like to have a tour guide around. Just in case you don't get lost. This place is pretty big, you know."
"Maybe I will."
"Maybe you will."
We stared at each other for a while, a smile playing on his lips, & I was just as bad.
"Hey... Why aren't we moving?" I asked.
We both glanced at the touch panel & realised that we didn't press the level button.
We burst laughing as we pressed the level number we were on.
"Hmm... Level 10, eh? Well... I heard people related to 10 are very lucky." he said.
"Lucky me. I happen to be 10... Plus six."
He smiled.
"I get the better luck. I'm 10 plus eight."
"Lucky you."
"Lucky me."
[ding]
"Guess you've reached your house."
"Yep. Bye." I gave him a last smile before I left the lift.
I didn't see him for a while. I mean, it wasn't like I was waiting for him.
Much.
I keep peeking out at my window, hoping to see him swimming around with his friends. The first thought that came to mind as I reached my room after that lift incident was, 'No way is he going to see me in my swimsuit!'
& I shall be sticking to that resolution.
'Aw... What the heck?' I thought as I grabbed the squash racquet, which was standing at the closet door for so long.
"Bye, dad! I'm off to play some squash!" I yelled out, my voice bouncing off the walls, loud enough for my dad to hear.
I threw the rubber ball up into the air & swung the racquet like mad, only making me seem like the crazy one around.
'I hate squash.' I thought miserably. 'I hate squash & forever I will!'
As I thought of that, I threw the ball into the air & hit the ball. I hit it so hard that it bounced off the ceiling so fast, like a meteorite. I ran to a corner to try & hit it again, but I missed.
"Bravo." I heard a deep voice say behind me, with the sounds of clapping.
At first I thought it'd been my dad, trying to tease me with his best immitation of Pierce Brosnan.
But I turned around & realised it wasn't my dad. It was him.
"Hey." I said casually, even though inwardly, I was freaking out!
What guy talks to me?
Not a very sane one, I tell you.
"Hey." he said right back. I couldn't help noticing that his eyes seem to be the same colour as the pool - clear blue.
"So... You play squash." he said as-a-matter-of-factly.
"Yea. But I'm no Nicole Davidson." I said as I tried to do warm-up for my right hand.
"Maybe. But I am." he said.
Man, this guy really has no modesty.
"Oh really?" I teased.
"Yes." he teased back, coming closer towards me & whispered, "Here." in my ear as he hugged me, putting his arms around mine, his right hand on mine, his left in the air, throwing the ball up in the air.
As it was in mid-air, he quickly grabbed both my arms & swung it with force, hitting the ball, making it bounce off the wall.
It came hurtling towards us - towards me!
Just as it got dangerously close, he quickly went in front of me - with grace, I must add - & caught the rubber ball with his bare hand.
You know, if this were those cartoons, that puny little black ball would turn red & steam'd be coming out from the guy's hand.
Oooh. Very romantic.
Uh, not.
As the realisation dawned upon me, I started to jump & squeal, "I did it! I did it!" over & over again with excitement.
Hey, I can't help it.
It's the first time I've manage to hit that stupid ball... Gracefully.
& also my first time having a guy's arms around me.
"Wow." I breathed.
"Yea, I know." he said, looking a little smug.
"So, what? You swim & play squash? What are you, Mr. Fit 07?" I joked.
Was it me or did his face turned redder for 10 seconds?
"Yea, well, I'm multi-talented." he finally said after the mentioned time.
"So what else are you good at?" I smiled.
"I should be asking you." he smiled back.
"Hmm... Well, you can see, I suck in squash. But I pay back for swimming."
"Swimming? We'll see about that." he said & grinned.
"Wha-? No! I mean... Uh..."
But it was too late. The damage was done.
"I'll be down five more mins." I said & ran to the lift.
Whoot-whoooo
Well, okay, it doesn't really sound like that but that's as close as I can put the wolf-like whistle he gave me when he saw me in the swimsuit.
What was to whistle at? The swimsuit was just a one-piece.
But it is a swimsuit.
& I am a girl.
"Let's swim." I said & dived into the pool.
We've been hanging out alot eversince that day. I found out his name - Josh Cartwrite.
I mean, that suits him. He does look like a Josh.
Which is kinda weird because I don't even know how a Josh is supposed to look like.
So for nearly two weeks, we kept meeting up, either to play squash or to swim in the pool.
A week before the Monthly test, I was stuck in my room, studying at the desk near my window.
I couldn't help but look out of the window - it wasn't like I was expecting to see Josh climbing a ladder to my room or something. It was just out of habit - & that was when I saw him.
& her.
"Marshee? Open up, Marsha!" my mom said loudly while banging on the door.
I didn't move to open the door nor did I move a muscle.
I just sat there with my tub of Baskin Robbins in my lap, staring blankly into space.
"C'mon Marshee. It's not healthy, a young girl like you staying in that room." she kept saying.
But the truth is, it's his fault. I mean, what was he doing?
Was he trying to lead me on? Or is he just some sort of freaky playboy of the neighbourhood?
I could hear my parents arguing outside my room, my dad defending for me, saying that this ism y first heartbreak, my mom saying that there are plenty of more fishes in the sea - or something like that.
My mobile phone rang & I pounced on it like a leopard whichw as starving itself to death.
"Oh, Marsh! What're you doing?" I heard a girl's voice say in my ear.
"Making a strike for girls being led on by idiotic playboys, that's what." I said back.
"Do you want me to come over?" the girl said.
The tears began to spring out of my eyes & I nodded my head vigorously.
Then, I realised that she can't see me nodding my head so I said, "Yes." in a small voice.
"Okay. So open up." she said & a knock was heard on my door.
I opened it & there stood my best friend with open arms.
"So you saw the guy giving a girl a piggyback. So what?" Carol said to me.
Carol's an amazing girl who's Ms. Popular. & she's not the show-offy kind either.
She's the kind who cares about her grades & not about her pink heels having mud on it or whatever.
Not only is she great & smart & athletic, she also has a boyfriend.
Steady for 4 months, I think with Garett.
Like that dude from Eragon, Garrett.
But he's a nice guy, no drugs or piercing or tattoos on him.
So he's approved.
"Yea, but it was a pretty girl. & she looked his age." I sniffed, hoping that the mucus doesn't drop in the Choc&Chips flavoured ice-cream tub.
"So? I've read this article about this guy - um, what was his name? Chris Hawt or something like that. Yea, the dude got a scholarship to Oxford in England, this is his 2nd year, I think. His mom? 36 years old." Carol said, hopping on the bed.
"2nd year? That means he's... 20?! The mom got him when she was in high school?" I said, trying really hard not to scream.
"Prom night." Carol said knowingly.
"Believe me, that girl on Josh's back? Not his mother."
I mean, okay. A girl who had her son when she was 16. Sure, whatever.
But the girl I saw on his back? So not a motherly look.
She was our age & wearing a bikini strap.
& she looks like a model.
The really, really naturally pretty kind, which everyone hates.
Well, okay. Maybe not everyone. Maybe just me.
As I explained it to Carol, she just shook her head & held my hand & said, "Don't worry. Sooner or later, it's gonna work out. I mean, from the way you told me about how you guys met, it must be, like, fate or something. True love based on fate does not just muss up & never get fixed again."
I smiled at her & squeezed her hand.
So what if I don't have him? I've got Carol.
"Hey. They say that squash takes out the anger. Why don't you play a game, huh?" she said.
Every hit I took, I kept thinking of those images of Josh with that girl on his back in the pool.
Bop!
He was laughing with her.
I ran to the left to hit the ball.
Bop!
He kept swinging her on his back.
For a few minutes, I was in that room alone, running to this corner & that, hitting the ball with all my force of my right arm.
I could've kept on going for maybe a couple more minutes until suddenly, the lights went off just as I heard the thunder crack outside the condo.
I collapse on the floor & sink my head into my knees, sobbing, the tears finally coming out.
There were three things which I heard at the exact same time.
My sobbing.
The ball bobbing up & down gently on the wooden floor.
Footsteps.
I didn't bother looking up - hell, I didn't have enough energy to look up.
I kept sobbing & I felt someone sitting down next to me.
Finally, I looked up & saw the last person I wanted to see - or maybe the first?
I couldn't think too much. My head was hurting - & as corny as this sounds, so does my heart.
Josh was sitting next to me, just looking at me with confusion & yet, understanding.
"What're you doing here?" I said bitterly, looking at my feet in the dark.
"Hey to you too." he said with a grin.
Even though it was dark, I still could see him smile.
Damn him.
He got the hint & said, "Hey, what's the matter? You've been ignoring me for two weeks now. That's a long time, ya know."
"Well, I thought you needed space with your girlfriend." I snapped.
"What? Girlfriend? I don't have one."
"Oh yea? Well, who was that on your back two weeks ago?" I challenged, biting back the urge to ask whether it was his mom to prove Carol that she's wrong.
He looked flustered & stared at the ground.
The silence between us was tormenting. I felt like screaming at him but I didn't have the energy, like I said.
"She's... She's my cousin."
I snorted. "Yea. Cousin."
"Yes, she's my cousin." he said, a little more firmly.
I looked up into his eyes, my vision being a little blurred what with all the tears.
Finally, I just decided to trust him on this one because he was looking at me with... Something that makes me want to trust him forever.
"Why didn't you just tell me your cousin was a model lookalike?" I said.
He laughed & I cried at the same moment - how could I've been so stupid? Josh wasn't that kind of playboy freak.
He's a nice guy with a healthy amount of male ego in himself, is all.
How could've I just doubt that?
"Hey." he said softly, softer than the first time.
He came towards me & hugged me.
I stayed there in the dark, under his arms. Feeling protected from the real world.
As if he wouldn't let me in harm's way.
I looked up at him & he returned the look.
He brushed away a stray teardrop flowing to my chin & for a reason I couldn't think of, our faces were going closer & closer until we crashed into each other's lips.
My friends & I always played Truth & Dare. That time with Josh?
We were playing Truth&Kiss.
Each truth, reward with a kiss.
He admitted to me that he saw me coming out of the squash room & my dad walking away.
So he ran towards the elevator behind me, just to get to know me a little bit more.
He got a big kiss from me.
I told him how jealous I was when I saw his cousin - her name's Jamelia, by the way - & actually thought he was a playboy freak.
Big kiss from him.
But the nicest one was the last. The one where he said that he never felt this way for anyone before.
A really big one from me. & a long one too.
"Why isn't the lights on?" I asked as I came up for some air.
Because the rain's stopped so the electricity must be back on.
He gave me a smile & said, "Truth? I switched it off."
Another big one from me.
So here I am, watching Josh, Jamelia & this other guy from the neighbourhood splashing each other with water. Jamelia's being bullied by the two so I think I better rescue her from her fate.
But before I leave, I've just to tell you one last thing:
I'm Josh's official girlfriend - 2 months steady & already double-dated with Carol & Garrett.
& now, we sometimes hang out with Jamelia but most of the times? I play squash with Josh & sometimes switch the lights off.
Really, I love squash.
Especially in the dark.
Wednesday, 28 February 2007
Coke & Sundae
It's her birthday today. Carolina's birthday is today.
"Um... Hi, Carol." I say after pushing past the crowd around her.
"Hi." she says with a smile.
I am nervous. Not only that, I'm an idiot too.
Why can't I say anything? Why am I just staring at her big, blue eyes & thinking that it went so well with her non-lip glossed pink lips? Why am I admiring her sleek, red hair?
Why can't I be cool like that stupid Jared, who can actually charm Carol? Why?
"Carol, can I... Um. Can I celebrate your birthday with y-"
Lily, a skinny girl who is often mistaken as a blonde, praying mantis, burst rudely in my best attempt to invite Carol for a treat & says, bouncing up & down, "Oh. My. God! Guess what, Caroline? I know this is supposed to be a surprise but I can't stand it! You see, J-"
My heart is beating fast. I know what Lily-what's-her-name's about to tell Carol. The big bash.
As predicted, seeing as Caroline is the most popular girl in school, her friends (the whole school) are throwing her this huge party at Jared's - most popular guy - house afterwards.
Also predicted, I'm not invited.
"Wait. Lily, that's rude of you. Garett was just about to say something to me."
"No, it's okay. It's stupid." I start muttering, to myself.
"It's not. It's sweet. I'll go. Tell Jared I just can't make it." she says to Lily & smile at me, right before the bell rang.
"Oh. 'kay." Lily says and scutter off - most likely to the girls, to tell them that Carol, the most popular, kindest, sweetest girl to ever walk down the hallways of this school is going to hang out with a spaz like me, Garett Wane.
I wake up to the sound of my alarm clock, buzzing like crazy. I nearly hit the snooze button until I realise that I'm 10 minutes late for my date - okay, date's a little too hopeful - with Carol at McD's!
After showering, I grabbed my best, casual T-shirt, a pair of jeans & I am off, dashing down the stairs & out the door.
'I really am a spaz...' I think as I switch on my handphone, hoping not to bump into anyone down the street.
"Okay, kid. Ya give the phone, & you're outta here." I suddenly hear a gruff voice say into my ear, & my collar feeling a little too tight.
I turn around & see a tall, big guy with a beard that covers half of his face.
Seems that I had taken a short cut down the deserted alley.
Something glinting catches my eye. It's a knife! The hobo/theif is holding a knife - & smudging my nice shirt!
"Look. I'll just run off & won't report you to the police." I stammer.
He laugh uproariously & say, "Fat chance, bub. Give the phone & not one body'd get hurt, ya understand?"
I sigh & give my phone grudgingly to the man.
He releases the fistful of my shirt & I start to run off, heading towards the McD.
Suddenly, it starts to rain.
'Aw, great.' I think to myself & start running to the nearest dry place I could find - a telephone booth.
I check my pockets & insert small change into the rustic old public phone.
"The number you have dialled is not available. At the term..."
Why isn't Carol picking up my calls? I wonder.
With a groan, I run out of the phone booth & to McD's.
Finally, I see the trademark yellow "M" shining in the rain.
Underneath the nylon light, I see Carol.
My heart starts to soar up & crash to the ground.
'Who's the guy with her?' I think.
It's Jared. Why's he always bugging me?
I squint & try to understand what they're doing.
Jared's asking her for a drink inside... Probably asking why's she standing outside.
She looks annoyed - at me, or Jared?
Most likely the first.
"CAROL!" I yell. She looks up & gives me a smile - an opposite effect with Jared, who's smile turn upside-down.
"I told you he'd make it." Carol says triumphantly to a rather-sad-looking Jared.
"Seems it's this lo- Uh... Friend. Well, he looks kinda beat up so why don't I just get you to a steakhouse & celebrate the day you're born? The world seems like a better place with you around." he says & puts a casual arm around her slender shoulders.
Carol looks uncomfortable. She pushes his hand away & says, "But I promised Garett I'd celebrate my birthday with him."
& with that, it seems that I'm the triumphant one.
The awkwardness is so thick. I feel like grabbing it & breaking it into half.
"Garett, why are you so quiet? Usually you'd be the first one to talk. What happened?" she says as I was sipping my coke.
I look away from her eyes & start to tell the story to her, or mostly to my feet.
"Oh my gosh! I'm so sorry. Why didn't you go to the police instead of here?"
Little sweat beads are starting to show up on my forehead - I can feel it.
"Well, it'd be kinda rude to stand you up, you know?" I say.
'Phew. Nice save.' I think to myself.
"Yes..." she says quietly & looks away.
"Actually, I didn't just came here to not stand you up! To be honest, it's been a long time since I want us to be just more than friends. Not just friends. I like you since the day I met you, when I had to stand in class & didn't know a single person. You're the nicest, most beautiful girl I've known. Let me put it this way : we're like this coke & sundae. Two different things, yet just the same. It's both sweet but one's fizzy, the other can just melt. Maybe, if we add it together, it'd be..." I say & look away, hoping that she doesn't notice how red my face is.
She gives me a blank look. Suddenly, she put the sundae inside my coke.
"Really? It can mix?" she says.
I give her a startled look. Is she making fun of me or processing my theory?
My coke suddenly started fizzing & all the foam went out of the cup, coke everywhere on the table.
I look at my coke & say, "What the-?"
'My luck really is bad. It feels that I should just give up already.' I think to myself, disappointment flowing through my veins.
I say, hoping that the disappointment doesn't show, "Huh. Seems..."
I break off my sentence in mid-air as I notice Carol sipping the sundae-mixed-with-coke.
"Mmm... Tasty." she says.
My heart can't stop beating - only from joy.
"Seems that there's no problem going together after all." she says with a smile.
"Hey! You didn't even wish me a happy birthday yet!" she says giggly.
"Oh. Uh... Happy birthday!" I say, scratching my head.
Maybe a true relationship doesn't really need luck. It just needs some courage & truth.
"Um... Hi, Carol." I say after pushing past the crowd around her.
"Hi." she says with a smile.
I am nervous. Not only that, I'm an idiot too.
Why can't I say anything? Why am I just staring at her big, blue eyes & thinking that it went so well with her non-lip glossed pink lips? Why am I admiring her sleek, red hair?
Why can't I be cool like that stupid Jared, who can actually charm Carol? Why?
"Carol, can I... Um. Can I celebrate your birthday with y-"
Lily, a skinny girl who is often mistaken as a blonde, praying mantis, burst rudely in my best attempt to invite Carol for a treat & says, bouncing up & down, "Oh. My. God! Guess what, Caroline? I know this is supposed to be a surprise but I can't stand it! You see, J-"
My heart is beating fast. I know what Lily-what's-her-name's about to tell Carol. The big bash.
As predicted, seeing as Caroline is the most popular girl in school, her friends (the whole school) are throwing her this huge party at Jared's - most popular guy - house afterwards.
Also predicted, I'm not invited.
"Wait. Lily, that's rude of you. Garett was just about to say something to me."
"No, it's okay. It's stupid." I start muttering, to myself.
"It's not. It's sweet. I'll go. Tell Jared I just can't make it." she says to Lily & smile at me, right before the bell rang.
"Oh. 'kay." Lily says and scutter off - most likely to the girls, to tell them that Carol, the most popular, kindest, sweetest girl to ever walk down the hallways of this school is going to hang out with a spaz like me, Garett Wane.
I wake up to the sound of my alarm clock, buzzing like crazy. I nearly hit the snooze button until I realise that I'm 10 minutes late for my date - okay, date's a little too hopeful - with Carol at McD's!
After showering, I grabbed my best, casual T-shirt, a pair of jeans & I am off, dashing down the stairs & out the door.
'I really am a spaz...' I think as I switch on my handphone, hoping not to bump into anyone down the street.
"Okay, kid. Ya give the phone, & you're outta here." I suddenly hear a gruff voice say into my ear, & my collar feeling a little too tight.
I turn around & see a tall, big guy with a beard that covers half of his face.
Seems that I had taken a short cut down the deserted alley.
Something glinting catches my eye. It's a knife! The hobo/theif is holding a knife - & smudging my nice shirt!
"Look. I'll just run off & won't report you to the police." I stammer.
He laugh uproariously & say, "Fat chance, bub. Give the phone & not one body'd get hurt, ya understand?"
I sigh & give my phone grudgingly to the man.
He releases the fistful of my shirt & I start to run off, heading towards the McD.
Suddenly, it starts to rain.
'Aw, great.' I think to myself & start running to the nearest dry place I could find - a telephone booth.
I check my pockets & insert small change into the rustic old public phone.
"The number you have dialled is not available. At the term..."
Why isn't Carol picking up my calls? I wonder.
With a groan, I run out of the phone booth & to McD's.
Finally, I see the trademark yellow "M" shining in the rain.
Underneath the nylon light, I see Carol.
My heart starts to soar up & crash to the ground.
'Who's the guy with her?' I think.
It's Jared. Why's he always bugging me?
I squint & try to understand what they're doing.
Jared's asking her for a drink inside... Probably asking why's she standing outside.
She looks annoyed - at me, or Jared?
Most likely the first.
"CAROL!" I yell. She looks up & gives me a smile - an opposite effect with Jared, who's smile turn upside-down.
"I told you he'd make it." Carol says triumphantly to a rather-sad-looking Jared.
"Seems it's this lo- Uh... Friend. Well, he looks kinda beat up so why don't I just get you to a steakhouse & celebrate the day you're born? The world seems like a better place with you around." he says & puts a casual arm around her slender shoulders.
Carol looks uncomfortable. She pushes his hand away & says, "But I promised Garett I'd celebrate my birthday with him."
& with that, it seems that I'm the triumphant one.
The awkwardness is so thick. I feel like grabbing it & breaking it into half.
"Garett, why are you so quiet? Usually you'd be the first one to talk. What happened?" she says as I was sipping my coke.
I look away from her eyes & start to tell the story to her, or mostly to my feet.
"Oh my gosh! I'm so sorry. Why didn't you go to the police instead of here?"
Little sweat beads are starting to show up on my forehead - I can feel it.
"Well, it'd be kinda rude to stand you up, you know?" I say.
'Phew. Nice save.' I think to myself.
"Yes..." she says quietly & looks away.
"Actually, I didn't just came here to not stand you up! To be honest, it's been a long time since I want us to be just more than friends. Not just friends. I like you since the day I met you, when I had to stand in class & didn't know a single person. You're the nicest, most beautiful girl I've known. Let me put it this way : we're like this coke & sundae. Two different things, yet just the same. It's both sweet but one's fizzy, the other can just melt. Maybe, if we add it together, it'd be..." I say & look away, hoping that she doesn't notice how red my face is.
She gives me a blank look. Suddenly, she put the sundae inside my coke.
"Really? It can mix?" she says.
I give her a startled look. Is she making fun of me or processing my theory?
My coke suddenly started fizzing & all the foam went out of the cup, coke everywhere on the table.
I look at my coke & say, "What the-?"
'My luck really is bad. It feels that I should just give up already.' I think to myself, disappointment flowing through my veins.
I say, hoping that the disappointment doesn't show, "Huh. Seems..."
I break off my sentence in mid-air as I notice Carol sipping the sundae-mixed-with-coke.
"Mmm... Tasty." she says.
My heart can't stop beating - only from joy.
"Seems that there's no problem going together after all." she says with a smile.
"Hey! You didn't even wish me a happy birthday yet!" she says giggly.
"Oh. Uh... Happy birthday!" I say, scratching my head.
Maybe a true relationship doesn't really need luck. It just needs some courage & truth.
Sunday, 25 February 2007
A library
I am a bookworm. I have no shame to say that out loud.
I. Am. A. Book. Worm.
So what if I'm blonde & am not flat-chested?
So what if I have 50-50 vision & not wearing spectacles?
Is there some sort of law that bookworms can't be... Those who doesn't "look" like one?
That's what I am thinking right now when Rob said, "Hey, are you reading a book?"
& cackled away.
I do not believe that that's the sort of attitude a boyfriend should have.
Sure, he's the head of the football & rugby team. Maybe he does go out to the Friday boozer party they have at pubs.
But either way, I don't think that my boyfriend should just be so shocked that I enjoy reading books.
"What happened to People magazine?" he say.
"What do I look like to you, a bimbo?" I snap.
"Well, you are hot."
That made my blood boil. So, he thinks I look like a girl he could boff?
Well, forget it.
I throw his class ring into the bushes, stand up & walk away from a swearing ex-boyfriend.
Hutaru is the most serene place I've ever been to. Bookworm, though I may be, this bookstore is really awesome.
It gives this whole calm vibe - the mini waterfall near the bookshelves, this cute little Japanese cafe behind the waterfall.
Really. Whatever book-hater would LOVE this place.
I notice a cute guy as I walked in, in jeans & a black, collared shirt, neat & crisp.
His hair is red, abit on the long-ish side, really. & he smiles lik-
'You've just broken up with your steady boyfriend & already you're checking some cute guy out? God, Shell, get a grip!' I scold myself.
I quickly head to the "Fantasy" section, hoping that I don't bump into that guy.
... Who am I kidding?
"Chronicle Edge, Chronicle Edge..." I murmur to myself as I check practically each book title lying on that shelf.
'Yes! It's there!!' I think as my gaze fall onto a thick, green book, the words "Chronicle Edge IV" engraved on it with gold letterings.
My hand shot out as fast as you can say "Light speed", just in case no one else takes the book away from me.
It was the last one.
Yes, I am a geekette.
I manage to get my hand on the book first, but another hand is ontop of mine.
It feels warm, big & warm.
I look at the person, whose hand is on mine & realise that it's that cute guy I saw just now!
Great. This is embarassing.
"Oh. Sorry." I hear the guy say, his voice soft, deep & low.
"Um, no prob." I say, hoping with all my strength that he did not just hear my voice shake.
"But I'm not sorry enough to let you walk off with my book."
Well, that is truly the most romantic moment of my life.
Um, not.
"Dream on. I had my eye on that two months ago!" I say, completely forgetting that the guy I'm fighting a book over with is completely hot.
"Yea? Well, I was having the countdown plastered on the screen five months ago."
"Lies. All lies." I smirk.
"Bet you a cup of coffee I'm correct."
"You're on."
"Lemme show you the evidence." He takes out his MacBook out of his laptop bag, which was slung casually over his broad shoulders.
He flips open the screen & shows me proudly a white banner bouncing up & down, which reads:
"COUNTDOWN TILL CHRONICLES EDGE : ALREADY OUT!!"
I feel my face flush - either with embarrassment or disappointment that I lost the bet.
"I like my coffee dark." he says with a grin.
"So, you're from the Academy too? How come I don't see you around?" I say as he blows the steam off his piping hot mug.
"Well, because I kind of just graduated." he says awkwardly, probably wishing that he isn't being seen hanging out with a kid who is still in high school - a.k.a. me.
"Seriously?" I say, kind of shocked.
Don't ask me why, he doesn't seem like a high school kind. But he doesn't seem like a college guy either.
For one thing, he's pretty shaven. No stubble or anything.
Which all I can say to that is, Thank God.
He nods.
"I'm still searching. No scholarships. Well, okay. That's a lie. I do have one offer but it's sort of... Far." he says, still looking uncomfortable.
"How far?"
"Try England far."
I nearly drop my iced latte.
How could he do that? Leaving to another continent!
'Why am I so furious?' I just met him! I try to reason with myself.
"Now you know." he says with a sheepish grin.
I shrug & say, "Well, it'd be a loss to the authors of Chronicles Edge. Their second biggest fan moving to a different place & all."
"What do you mean second?! You're not going to another continent."
"Please. How many books of theirs do you have?"
"All."
"Lies!"
"Do you really want to bet, after losing?"
"Hey! That's not fair to bring up a loss." I say & whack him, not too hard. "Anyway, that's a lie. You can't have all the books. I'll even... I'll even bet a kiss that you don't."
Yes, I am that confident he does not have the whole series. Because everyone knows that if you have the whole series, you must be the kid of a millionaire's or something. The series is not cheap.
He gave me a smile & say, "You're on."
Just in the same day I broke up with Rob Mogregger, I end up riding a motorbike with a college guy, Chris Haught to go to his house - not for the reasons you might think, but to check out his set of books.
Sarcasm asides, I really am living my romance dream.
"I think you owe me a kiss." he says when he notice how big my eyes have gone. He really did have the whole series! Every book, from the germglozer to the Forever & beyond! He wasn't lying.
"No, you're missing one book. You didn't buy the last book, remember?" I remind him.
His smile crestfallens. But slyly brightens again.
"Yes. But only because I already have it." he says.
He look under the bed & takes out a box which was neatly kept. He opens the lid & voila!
There was the thick, green book with the gold letters, big & bold blazing on it.
"You do owe me a kiss. & there's no escape." he says, which just made my pulse beat faster.
Here I am, kissing the cutest guy on his bed. My hands are around his neck, his hands are...
Well, I can't say it here & now.
All I can say is, he kissed me, not me!
Okay, that's a lie. I kinda did started it.
But all I did was go closer to him, closed my eyes tight & leaned towards his face.
Then, he cupped my face & leaned even closer. Just like that, we were kissing.
His lips are soft. Very soft.
Yet his hands are so rough, even though they're holding me so gently.
I really don't want this moment to end.
Not now, not ever.
"SHELL, IM IN THE AIRPORT NOW. ON MY WAY TO ENGLAND. I'LL MISS YOU GBYE 4EVA"
That was the text message I got just recently. Now I'm on my scooter, zooming the traffic as fast as I can to reach the airport.
It didn't help that the tears are blurring my view.
'Stupid. Don't cry. Stupid.' I tell myself.
So maybe we dated for a month, maybe two.
Now all of a sudden, he tells me he's going to England in the next three hours instead of, gee, I don't know. THAT LAST MONTH?!
'Maybe he doesn't think we're together. He never asked.' I think to myself as I passed by a Trans Am.
Out of breath, I run to the gate A278.
"Gate A276... Gate A277..." I count.
"Gate A278!"
I run even faster & see a girl hugging Christ.
Not just a girl, an older one. Older than me, hell, older than him.
She had the skimpiest outfit I had ever seen.
The girl seemed more like his... Girlfriend.
Crash!
"Shell? Michelle? Wait! No!" I hear.
"Who's Michelle? What's going on?" I hear the chick say.
But I didn't care. Not anymore. I run faster as if I was being chased by wolves - only to find that I was dating one.
"SHELL IT'S NOT WHAT YOU THINK. COME OUTTA THERE"
Another text message. I deleted it & continued my silent sobbing.
Why didn't I see it? No guy could be that perfect.
One who is equally hot as he is equally smart & brainy.
Ten minutes passed & I couldn't stand it. I get out of the woman's toilet & hoped that he isn't out there, waiting for me.
Only to find out that he is.
Never in my life had I seen a woman that sad.
Even though she was sad, she still looked as gorgeous as she'll ever be.
Sure, sad-looking women ticks me off. I've got enough of those in my life.
But the way she looked up at me, with those red-rimmed eyes, mascara going down along with her tears, something inside me broke.
I hug her & at first, she didn't hug me back. But a moment passed, she finally hug me.
She look up & kissed me.
I kiss her back. Soft, tender. Whatever I felt towards her, I put in that kiss.
"Shell, look. About that woman... She's..."
I feel Shell tensing up. She thinks she's my girlfriend.
I'm used to it, but now I can't stand it.
"She's... My mom."
"That's right. You heard me. My mother. The woman who brought me into this life. A result of prom day." he gives a grin.
I stare. That was his mother?!
Skimpy-clothes-wearing-woman... His mom??
"I... I..."
I jump & kiss him.
"Calling passenger to Gate A278. Calling passenger to Gate A278. Flight will be taking off in ten minutes. Thank you." the announcer says.
"Goodbye." he says before he gives me one last kiss, a hug & a gift.
I couldn't stop smiling & crying at the same time.
It was a book. No, two books.
One was a notebook, filled with written stories & his thoughts... Just for me.
Another was a storybook.
The Chronicles Edge storybook which I had been waiting for since day 1.
He scribbled a little writing on the front page itself:
"Don't forget me. I'll be back.
Love, Christ."
I. Am. A. Book. Worm.
So what if I'm blonde & am not flat-chested?
So what if I have 50-50 vision & not wearing spectacles?
Is there some sort of law that bookworms can't be... Those who doesn't "look" like one?
That's what I am thinking right now when Rob said, "Hey, are you reading a book?"
& cackled away.
I do not believe that that's the sort of attitude a boyfriend should have.
Sure, he's the head of the football & rugby team. Maybe he does go out to the Friday boozer party they have at pubs.
But either way, I don't think that my boyfriend should just be so shocked that I enjoy reading books.
"What happened to People magazine?" he say.
"What do I look like to you, a bimbo?" I snap.
"Well, you are hot."
That made my blood boil. So, he thinks I look like a girl he could boff?
Well, forget it.
I throw his class ring into the bushes, stand up & walk away from a swearing ex-boyfriend.
Hutaru is the most serene place I've ever been to. Bookworm, though I may be, this bookstore is really awesome.
It gives this whole calm vibe - the mini waterfall near the bookshelves, this cute little Japanese cafe behind the waterfall.
Really. Whatever book-hater would LOVE this place.
I notice a cute guy as I walked in, in jeans & a black, collared shirt, neat & crisp.
His hair is red, abit on the long-ish side, really. & he smiles lik-
'You've just broken up with your steady boyfriend & already you're checking some cute guy out? God, Shell, get a grip!' I scold myself.
I quickly head to the "Fantasy" section, hoping that I don't bump into that guy.
... Who am I kidding?
"Chronicle Edge, Chronicle Edge..." I murmur to myself as I check practically each book title lying on that shelf.
'Yes! It's there!!' I think as my gaze fall onto a thick, green book, the words "Chronicle Edge IV" engraved on it with gold letterings.
My hand shot out as fast as you can say "Light speed", just in case no one else takes the book away from me.
It was the last one.
Yes, I am a geekette.
I manage to get my hand on the book first, but another hand is ontop of mine.
It feels warm, big & warm.
I look at the person, whose hand is on mine & realise that it's that cute guy I saw just now!
Great. This is embarassing.
"Oh. Sorry." I hear the guy say, his voice soft, deep & low.
"Um, no prob." I say, hoping with all my strength that he did not just hear my voice shake.
"But I'm not sorry enough to let you walk off with my book."
Well, that is truly the most romantic moment of my life.
Um, not.
"Dream on. I had my eye on that two months ago!" I say, completely forgetting that the guy I'm fighting a book over with is completely hot.
"Yea? Well, I was having the countdown plastered on the screen five months ago."
"Lies. All lies." I smirk.
"Bet you a cup of coffee I'm correct."
"You're on."
"Lemme show you the evidence." He takes out his MacBook out of his laptop bag, which was slung casually over his broad shoulders.
He flips open the screen & shows me proudly a white banner bouncing up & down, which reads:
"COUNTDOWN TILL CHRONICLES EDGE : ALREADY OUT!!"
I feel my face flush - either with embarrassment or disappointment that I lost the bet.
"I like my coffee dark." he says with a grin.
"So, you're from the Academy too? How come I don't see you around?" I say as he blows the steam off his piping hot mug.
"Well, because I kind of just graduated." he says awkwardly, probably wishing that he isn't being seen hanging out with a kid who is still in high school - a.k.a. me.
"Seriously?" I say, kind of shocked.
Don't ask me why, he doesn't seem like a high school kind. But he doesn't seem like a college guy either.
For one thing, he's pretty shaven. No stubble or anything.
Which all I can say to that is, Thank God.
He nods.
"I'm still searching. No scholarships. Well, okay. That's a lie. I do have one offer but it's sort of... Far." he says, still looking uncomfortable.
"How far?"
"Try England far."
I nearly drop my iced latte.
How could he do that? Leaving to another continent!
'Why am I so furious?' I just met him! I try to reason with myself.
"Now you know." he says with a sheepish grin.
I shrug & say, "Well, it'd be a loss to the authors of Chronicles Edge. Their second biggest fan moving to a different place & all."
"What do you mean second?! You're not going to another continent."
"Please. How many books of theirs do you have?"
"All."
"Lies!"
"Do you really want to bet, after losing?"
"Hey! That's not fair to bring up a loss." I say & whack him, not too hard. "Anyway, that's a lie. You can't have all the books. I'll even... I'll even bet a kiss that you don't."
Yes, I am that confident he does not have the whole series. Because everyone knows that if you have the whole series, you must be the kid of a millionaire's or something. The series is not cheap.
He gave me a smile & say, "You're on."
Just in the same day I broke up with Rob Mogregger, I end up riding a motorbike with a college guy, Chris Haught to go to his house - not for the reasons you might think, but to check out his set of books.
Sarcasm asides, I really am living my romance dream.
"I think you owe me a kiss." he says when he notice how big my eyes have gone. He really did have the whole series! Every book, from the germglozer to the Forever & beyond! He wasn't lying.
"No, you're missing one book. You didn't buy the last book, remember?" I remind him.
His smile crestfallens. But slyly brightens again.
"Yes. But only because I already have it." he says.
He look under the bed & takes out a box which was neatly kept. He opens the lid & voila!
There was the thick, green book with the gold letters, big & bold blazing on it.
"You do owe me a kiss. & there's no escape." he says, which just made my pulse beat faster.
Here I am, kissing the cutest guy on his bed. My hands are around his neck, his hands are...
Well, I can't say it here & now.
All I can say is, he kissed me, not me!
Okay, that's a lie. I kinda did started it.
But all I did was go closer to him, closed my eyes tight & leaned towards his face.
Then, he cupped my face & leaned even closer. Just like that, we were kissing.
His lips are soft. Very soft.
Yet his hands are so rough, even though they're holding me so gently.
I really don't want this moment to end.
Not now, not ever.
"SHELL, IM IN THE AIRPORT NOW. ON MY WAY TO ENGLAND. I'LL MISS YOU GBYE 4EVA"
That was the text message I got just recently. Now I'm on my scooter, zooming the traffic as fast as I can to reach the airport.
It didn't help that the tears are blurring my view.
'Stupid. Don't cry. Stupid.' I tell myself.
So maybe we dated for a month, maybe two.
Now all of a sudden, he tells me he's going to England in the next three hours instead of, gee, I don't know. THAT LAST MONTH?!
'Maybe he doesn't think we're together. He never asked.' I think to myself as I passed by a Trans Am.
Out of breath, I run to the gate A278.
"Gate A276... Gate A277..." I count.
"Gate A278!"
I run even faster & see a girl hugging Christ.
Not just a girl, an older one. Older than me, hell, older than him.
She had the skimpiest outfit I had ever seen.
The girl seemed more like his... Girlfriend.
Crash!
"Shell? Michelle? Wait! No!" I hear.
"Who's Michelle? What's going on?" I hear the chick say.
But I didn't care. Not anymore. I run faster as if I was being chased by wolves - only to find that I was dating one.
"SHELL IT'S NOT WHAT YOU THINK. COME OUTTA THERE"
Another text message. I deleted it & continued my silent sobbing.
Why didn't I see it? No guy could be that perfect.
One who is equally hot as he is equally smart & brainy.
Ten minutes passed & I couldn't stand it. I get out of the woman's toilet & hoped that he isn't out there, waiting for me.
Only to find out that he is.
Never in my life had I seen a woman that sad.
Even though she was sad, she still looked as gorgeous as she'll ever be.
Sure, sad-looking women ticks me off. I've got enough of those in my life.
But the way she looked up at me, with those red-rimmed eyes, mascara going down along with her tears, something inside me broke.
I hug her & at first, she didn't hug me back. But a moment passed, she finally hug me.
She look up & kissed me.
I kiss her back. Soft, tender. Whatever I felt towards her, I put in that kiss.
"Shell, look. About that woman... She's..."
I feel Shell tensing up. She thinks she's my girlfriend.
I'm used to it, but now I can't stand it.
"She's... My mom."
"That's right. You heard me. My mother. The woman who brought me into this life. A result of prom day." he gives a grin.
I stare. That was his mother?!
Skimpy-clothes-wearing-woman... His mom??
"I... I..."
I jump & kiss him.
"Calling passenger to Gate A278. Calling passenger to Gate A278. Flight will be taking off in ten minutes. Thank you." the announcer says.
"Goodbye." he says before he gives me one last kiss, a hug & a gift.
I couldn't stop smiling & crying at the same time.
It was a book. No, two books.
One was a notebook, filled with written stories & his thoughts... Just for me.
Another was a storybook.
The Chronicles Edge storybook which I had been waiting for since day 1.
He scribbled a little writing on the front page itself:
"Don't forget me. I'll be back.
Love, Christ."
Saturday, 24 February 2007
A music school - op 1
The first time when I saw a piano, I was only four.
"Look, Mommy! What is that?" I'd bounce around as I tug on my mother's shirt, staring at a grand piano being displayed, probably for showcase.
She laughed, "That's a piano, dear."
She went into the shop & asked the sales assistant whether she could play something on the piano.
The minute I heard that beautiful piece my mother played - coming from just something made out of strings & wood, something so beautiful, I stared.
The next day, my mother took me for piano lessons at Zellar, supposedly the most famous (& priciest) children's music school in the city.
& that was how I ended up on that stage, performing infront of everyone a piano piece twelve years later.
You might be thinking "What is so great about music? Bor-ring!"
Yea, I get that response alot so, I don't mind. Much.
To be honest, Zellar is actually like another world for me. In school, my friends always think I'm the quiet, shy type.
When I go to class at Zellar, I'm a little more outgoing, but only those who I know. Other times, I'd be ten times more shy & quiet.
Asides from learning about Mozart & his life, or even Vivaldi & his last opera, we do theory too. It's not that bad.
It's gaining knowledge.
After studying at that music school for nearly 16 years, my teacher signs me up for orchestra.
I loathe it but now, I love it.
I've been labelled "Percussion Girl" eversince. I never took up a second instrument because I didn't put much effort into the piano, nor did I have the time.
But the teachers make such a big deal that I can cope playing the tambourine. Really, I don't understand.
They say that I can "learn so quickly".
One of the teachers, Vivan - she's the most respected. After Mrs. Zellar, of course. Vivan has been in the school since SHE was eight. Now, she's a happy mother & a wife - always give me percussion solos. I enjoy it but I don't like taking up the limelight. It's a little embarrassing.
When I packed up my glockenspiel - don't try to pronounce it - I got up & nearly knocked over someone... Or more likely, that someone nearly knocked me over.
He was cute, (the boy cute, not baby cute) his brown, shaggy hair nearly covering his eyes, which were emerald green.
"Oh, so sorry." he said. I noted that he had a British accent.
He kneeled down to pick up his case - a flute case. He was a flutist - & passed me by.
I didn't so much as turn around to apologize.
I hate myself.
3 months after that incident, my teacher, Wenno, arranged a piece for us - by "us" meaning my group class - to perform.
I was stuck with the marimba (surprise, surprise), my friend, Chulian with the clarinet, Steff & Key Nee playing the violin & a guy named Allary to play the flute.
This was unusual, was the first thought that I had.
Wenno invited someone to help play the flute - an accompaniement for the marimba.
A knock was heard at the auditorium door.
"Come in." we all said in unison.
There I saw the boy who I knocked over was walking over to the grand piano, most likely to greet Wenno.
At that time, you could have just tip me over with a feather. I was that surprised.
He looked at me & gave a small smile.
I returned the smile back & hid my face with my long hair.
"That was quite good as always, Leila." Wenno gushed.
I shrugged it off - compliments always made me feel uneasy.
"Yea, you were pretty good." a voice said.
It was him, Allary. I gave a small smile & blushed.
"We have another surprise, though. Lets perform the second piece, Loving You."
"But Medine isn't here! Who's going to sing? We all have to play our instruments." I said.
"Why don't you sing, Leila?" Allary asked.
"Oh, but I've never really s-"
"Actually, Allary's right. Why don't you sing? We always perform. Allary, go play the flute. Just accompany Leila sing."
He nodded & went to get his flute.
It was like an angel singing. I had never heard a voice as beautiful as that.
Leila striked me as one of those shy types. But when she sang, it was as if the heaven broke open, just like in that Mr. Bean show.
The melody helped too. It was so catchy.
I couldn't believe seeing that girl, though. I had thought of her as a snob when she didn't apologize for nearly bumping me off.
But there she was, singing.
All because of me.
His flute was amazing. It was as if he's the world's greatest flutist.
Really. He could've just played the "Bumblebee race" & wouldn't miss a note.
Three weeks later, we performed the pieces.
I ended up singing, since Medine had lost her voice.
A day after that, I started going out with Allary.
You might even just say I had my first ever boyfriend.
Who was a flute prodigy. A cute one, no less.
I discovered that he & I are so opposite - & alike.
By alike, he & I are pretty quiet.
By opposite, he secretly composes songs for himself so he could play more on his flute. I just like to play songs on my piano - especially from the Romantic era. But now, I've found a new pastime, thanks to him.
We broke up after a year. Not really but in a way, we did.
I was there at the airport when he went off to London, to accept the invitation of performing with the Royal Philharmonic Orchestra whereas I just played part-time keeping my Percussion Girl reputation alive at home & my singing reputation worldwide.
That was the last time I saw Allary, walking to the Departing section, GateA72.
I couldn't stop crying & smiling, at the same time.
The night before that, he told me it would be fine. Everything would be fine.
He even gave me a token from his heart - his words. A small chain necklace with a heart-shaped pendant.
He wore one too, only it was just an empty circle.
When put together, our pendants fit perfectly.
As he put the necklace on me, he said those words.
"Everything would be fine."
But I couldn't believe he wouldn't wait.
But we were already 17. Well, I was 17. He was already 18.
"Leila?" I turned around & saw Chulian, looking embarrassed & uncomfortable.
"Hmm?"
He handed me a rectangular parcel, my name written on the brown paper by a scriblly writing.
I opened it eagerly & nearly choked up.
It was a manuscript, filled with original songs composed by someone.
At the back page, he wrote:
"To someone special. I hope you sing as well as I play.
-Allary"
Chulian handed me two tissue boxes, I think.
The book's now framed. Sometimes I take it out to sing the songs he'd compose for me, or play on the piano.
That was my first closest friend I had in a long time.
He still sends me manuscripts, as a hobby from travelling with the Orchestra so much.
I always finger the necklace that was always around me.
"Look, Mommy! What is that?" I'd bounce around as I tug on my mother's shirt, staring at a grand piano being displayed, probably for showcase.
She laughed, "That's a piano, dear."
She went into the shop & asked the sales assistant whether she could play something on the piano.
The minute I heard that beautiful piece my mother played - coming from just something made out of strings & wood, something so beautiful, I stared.
The next day, my mother took me for piano lessons at Zellar, supposedly the most famous (& priciest) children's music school in the city.
& that was how I ended up on that stage, performing infront of everyone a piano piece twelve years later.
You might be thinking "What is so great about music? Bor-ring!"
Yea, I get that response alot so, I don't mind. Much.
To be honest, Zellar is actually like another world for me. In school, my friends always think I'm the quiet, shy type.
When I go to class at Zellar, I'm a little more outgoing, but only those who I know. Other times, I'd be ten times more shy & quiet.
Asides from learning about Mozart & his life, or even Vivaldi & his last opera, we do theory too. It's not that bad.
It's gaining knowledge.
After studying at that music school for nearly 16 years, my teacher signs me up for orchestra.
I loathe it but now, I love it.
I've been labelled "Percussion Girl" eversince. I never took up a second instrument because I didn't put much effort into the piano, nor did I have the time.
But the teachers make such a big deal that I can cope playing the tambourine. Really, I don't understand.
They say that I can "learn so quickly".
One of the teachers, Vivan - she's the most respected. After Mrs. Zellar, of course. Vivan has been in the school since SHE was eight. Now, she's a happy mother & a wife - always give me percussion solos. I enjoy it but I don't like taking up the limelight. It's a little embarrassing.
When I packed up my glockenspiel - don't try to pronounce it - I got up & nearly knocked over someone... Or more likely, that someone nearly knocked me over.
He was cute, (the boy cute, not baby cute) his brown, shaggy hair nearly covering his eyes, which were emerald green.
"Oh, so sorry." he said. I noted that he had a British accent.
He kneeled down to pick up his case - a flute case. He was a flutist - & passed me by.
I didn't so much as turn around to apologize.
I hate myself.
3 months after that incident, my teacher, Wenno, arranged a piece for us - by "us" meaning my group class - to perform.
I was stuck with the marimba (surprise, surprise), my friend, Chulian with the clarinet, Steff & Key Nee playing the violin & a guy named Allary to play the flute.
This was unusual, was the first thought that I had.
Wenno invited someone to help play the flute - an accompaniement for the marimba.
A knock was heard at the auditorium door.
"Come in." we all said in unison.
There I saw the boy who I knocked over was walking over to the grand piano, most likely to greet Wenno.
At that time, you could have just tip me over with a feather. I was that surprised.
He looked at me & gave a small smile.
I returned the smile back & hid my face with my long hair.
"That was quite good as always, Leila." Wenno gushed.
I shrugged it off - compliments always made me feel uneasy.
"Yea, you were pretty good." a voice said.
It was him, Allary. I gave a small smile & blushed.
"We have another surprise, though. Lets perform the second piece, Loving You."
"But Medine isn't here! Who's going to sing? We all have to play our instruments." I said.
"Why don't you sing, Leila?" Allary asked.
"Oh, but I've never really s-"
"Actually, Allary's right. Why don't you sing? We always perform. Allary, go play the flute. Just accompany Leila sing."
He nodded & went to get his flute.
It was like an angel singing. I had never heard a voice as beautiful as that.
Leila striked me as one of those shy types. But when she sang, it was as if the heaven broke open, just like in that Mr. Bean show.
The melody helped too. It was so catchy.
I couldn't believe seeing that girl, though. I had thought of her as a snob when she didn't apologize for nearly bumping me off.
But there she was, singing.
All because of me.
His flute was amazing. It was as if he's the world's greatest flutist.
Really. He could've just played the "Bumblebee race" & wouldn't miss a note.
Three weeks later, we performed the pieces.
I ended up singing, since Medine had lost her voice.
A day after that, I started going out with Allary.
You might even just say I had my first ever boyfriend.
Who was a flute prodigy. A cute one, no less.
I discovered that he & I are so opposite - & alike.
By alike, he & I are pretty quiet.
By opposite, he secretly composes songs for himself so he could play more on his flute. I just like to play songs on my piano - especially from the Romantic era. But now, I've found a new pastime, thanks to him.
We broke up after a year. Not really but in a way, we did.
I was there at the airport when he went off to London, to accept the invitation of performing with the Royal Philharmonic Orchestra whereas I just played part-time keeping my Percussion Girl reputation alive at home & my singing reputation worldwide.
That was the last time I saw Allary, walking to the Departing section, GateA72.
I couldn't stop crying & smiling, at the same time.
The night before that, he told me it would be fine. Everything would be fine.
He even gave me a token from his heart - his words. A small chain necklace with a heart-shaped pendant.
He wore one too, only it was just an empty circle.
When put together, our pendants fit perfectly.
As he put the necklace on me, he said those words.
"Everything would be fine."
But I couldn't believe he wouldn't wait.
But we were already 17. Well, I was 17. He was already 18.
"Leila?" I turned around & saw Chulian, looking embarrassed & uncomfortable.
"Hmm?"
He handed me a rectangular parcel, my name written on the brown paper by a scriblly writing.
I opened it eagerly & nearly choked up.
It was a manuscript, filled with original songs composed by someone.
At the back page, he wrote:
"To someone special. I hope you sing as well as I play.
-Allary"
Chulian handed me two tissue boxes, I think.
The book's now framed. Sometimes I take it out to sing the songs he'd compose for me, or play on the piano.
That was my first closest friend I had in a long time.
He still sends me manuscripts, as a hobby from travelling with the Orchestra so much.
I always finger the necklace that was always around me.
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